Bleed for Me
by DreamNin
Summary: "Where right and wrong no longer exist and forbidden is a fruit too tempting to resist." This is their bittersweet melody. KakaSaku
1. Hear Me

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, why would I be writing a FANfic? Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto, lucky bastard…

**Bleed for Me**

Chapter 1: Hear Me

Weak rays of light were just beginning to break through the early morning mist as a lone figure stood in front of the stone he had visited so many times before. He ran his thumb across three names newly carved into the smooth black stone of the memorial, deep in thought.

_Once again, I'm still here while those who should be aren't. Why? Why am I always the one to survive? What makes me so special? Is this my punishment? To linger on and watch while everyone close to me withers away?_

It had been dark when he had first arrived a few hours ago and he was slightly damp from the cold moisture in the air. The sky was just now beginning to lighten, signaling the coming of a new day.

_They didn't deserve this. I was the one who should've died. Not them. Not like this._

A bird chirped somewhere off in the distance, breaking the silver-haired ninja out of his sorrowful reverie. People would be waking soon; filling the empty streets of the village going about their daily errands. It was time he got going.

"Same time tomorrow guys?" he whispered over his shoulder. If an answer was forthcoming, it would just have to go unheard, for he was already gone.

* * *

He had been there. 

She hadn't seen him, but as she approached the vacant clearing, flower in hand, she could just _feel_ him. The lingering remnants of his presence there calmed her as she set down the flower on the cold stone base.

He was there every morning he could for who knows how long, but he always left before she got there. She had always wondered which names it was that called him there time after time. The 21 year old hadn't seen the elite jounin around in at least a month and it had been even longer since she had spoken to him. They used to have deep, intellectual conversations; something she hadn't known she could have with him until that day so many years ago.

* * *

"_Kakashi-sensei!" a small pink-haired girl of thirteen called out, starting to get a little irritated. She had been looking for the elusive man since early that morning and it was now past noon._

"_Where are you, you stupid pervert?" the irate girl grumbled to herself wandering into a little clearing where her sensei often trained._

"_Who's a pervert?" a deep voice whispered into her ear from behind with a hint of amusement in his voice._

_Startled, the girl turned around quickly. So quickly in fact that she lost her balance and fell rather gracelessly on her behind with a small "umph"._

"_Ah! K-K-Kakashi-sensei!" she said embarrassedly looking up at the smiling nin from her place on the ground._

"_Yo," he said casually accompanied by a small wave of his hand. _

_Though he didn't show it, he was actually rather surprised that the young girl had come seeking him out. After Naruto had left to go train with Jiraiya, he hadn't seen much of the pink-haired genin as she had fully immersed herself in her medical studies with Tsunade. He figured that that was her way of keeping her mind off of the pain of losing her two teammates, just as his books were his. _

"_Where did you co- ah, never mind," she cut herself off while picking herself up from the ground. She knew he had probably sensed her coming long before she had even called out for him. He was Kakashi after all._

"_You were looking for me," Kakashi said as more of a statement than a question as he started walking back towards the cherry blossom tree in the middle of the clearing._

"_Um…yes, I was. I have a favor to ask of you sensei," she said shyly wringing her hands out in front of her as she quickly followed him._

"_What kind of favor?" he asked cocking his head back to look at her, raising his one visible eyebrow. Upon reaching the tree, he sat down with his back against it. _

_Sakura was a little hesitant to say why it was that she had been looking for him now that she had finally found her old teacher. How would he react to her request? Even though it had been months since Sasuke and Naruto's departure, the wounds were still fresh in her heart. She wasn't sure about him, but somehow it just felt wrong being here with Kakashi…without them._

_Pushing these thoughts aside, she stopped in front of him, but kept her eyes to the ground. "Well…Tsunade-shishou said that the chuunin exams were coming up in three weeks and what with all the work she has to do in preparation for them, she said she wouldn't have time to train me, so I came here to ask if you would… um…" she said quietly suddenly aware of how absurd this request sounded. I mean why would the infamous copy nin take time out of his schedule to train her? It's not like he was her teacher anymore. She was just a lowly genin with no particular talent for anything other than genjutsu and even then only at recognizing and releasing. Compared to Naruto and Sasuke, she was nothing. Would he be willing to give her a chance? What if he laughed at her? She suddenly wanted nothing more than to melt into the ground when his penetrating black orb peered out at her from behind that little orange book that she wasn't even aware that he had pulled out._

"_So let me get this straight. You want _me_ to train _you_?" he said slowly making sure to put particular emphasis on the words "me" and "you". _

_She nodded. _Here it comes_, she thought and shut her eyes tightly as if that would stop her from hearing the horrible words that were about to be spoken. She held her breath._

"_Ok."_

_She just about had an aneurysm. Her eyes shot open and she all but screamed, "_WHAT?!?!_"_

_Kakashi resisted the urge to cover his ears at the sound of her shrill exclamation. Vaguely he wondered if he had made the right decision. Things had been quiet without the orange-clad ninja around stirring up trouble and with his team disbanded, he had had plenty of time to think. Along with his thoughts of his former team came his thoughts of guilt. He believed it to be his fault that Sasuke and Naruto had left because he wasn't a strong enough teacher. He couldn't teach them how to get stronger so Sasuke could have his revenge and Naruto could get Sasuke back. They were thoughts that had plagued him since that day on the roof of the hospital._

_Kakashi had also felt guilty that he had neglected Sakura. In the wake of her two extraordinary teammates, he had overlooked her and so she had gone to the Hokage for training. But this was his chance to make it up to her. If he trained her now and she made chuunin, it would be like he had never forsaken her at all, right? It was selfish and he knew it, but what else could he do? The truth was, although he would never admit it, he had kind of missed her. Yes, without his team to occupy his time these days he had been slightly lonely. But how was that any different from any other day? He would reason with himself. _

_I mean sure he could've said no and had the next three weeks to devote entirely to the newest installment in the _Icha Icha_ series, _Icha Icha Survival_, but then he would be on the receiving end of a bunch of unnaturally strong punches from an indignant Hokage as well as a string of insults about him being lazy or perverted or something equally uncalled-for and all because he refused to train her little protégé. The insults he could take as if she hadn't even thrown them, the punches…not so much. Besides, how could he say no to his favorite student? His only student who didn't make him want to pull an Itachi on them. Not that that had anything to do with his favoritism towards her mind you. Breathing in deeply, he reiterated, "I said ok Sakura-chan. I'll train you."_

_He almost laughed when he saw the partially incapacitated girl's features go from a state of shock to elation faster than the eye, particularly his eye, could see. Her bright green eyes seemed to get even brighter as a huge smile spread across her face. She even seemed to be shaking with what Kakashi didn't have even the slightest. He hadn't known this had meant so much to her. His eye creased in the corner as he smiled at her little display that reminded him of the girl she had been before all this mess had happened. It was nice to know that she was still in there somewhere._

_He must have been lost in thought because before he could even react, Sakura had launched herself at him and threw her arms around him in an unexpected hug. Startled at the sudden contact, Kakashi's eye widened and dropped his book as he just sat there stunned. No one had ever impeded upon his personal space before with the exception of Naruto when he got too emotional and the occasional enemy nin trying to kill him, but never Sakura._

"_Thank you Kakashi-sensei," she all but whispered, eyes closed still smiling. Kakashi's body that had been tense since before she even finished wrapping her arms around him finally relaxed and he smiled again. He reached a hand up to her short pink hair and ruffled it like he always did._

"_You're welcome, Sakura."

* * *

_

Sakura smiled to herself as she thought back to that day. The event in itself hadn't been that meaningful, but it was the start of something that she held dear to her. It was that cherished thing that was meaningful to her and that was why she now found herself reminiscing about how it came to be.

* * *

_The three weeks she had spent training with Kakashi could be described in one wonderful word._

_Painful. Exhausting. Horrible. Frustrating. Miserable. Agonizing. Brutal. Excruciating. Sadistic._

_Ok. So that was 9 words. But they all mean basically the same thing and can be summed up into one word._

_Kakashi._

_Sakura remembered Kakashi's borderline cruel training regime which consisted of spars that resulted in Sakura getting beaten to a pulp while Kakashi remained unscathed and only ended when she fell unconscious, and sometimes not even then, repeating jutsu so many times that she was left with barely enough chakra to survive, running until she puked and doing one-arm pushups while Kakashi just sat on her back reading his stupid smut and barking orders at her like "bend your arm more before I bend it the other way!" And this she had done 20 times! Not 21 because she had been unconscious after the first time for an entire day and a half._

_She shivered though it had nothing to do with the cold._

_Yes, those days had been some of the worst in her life, but she had passed the chuunin exam with flying colors and she wasn't nearly conceited enough to think that she had done it all on her own._

_After she had become a chuunin, she had felt obligated to do something for Kakashi. Not only had he ensured that she would become a chuunin, but he had also given her confidence in herself. He made her feel like she was just as good as the boys although the topic had never come up. For that, she was grateful. She didn't want to end up crying in front of Kakashi when she had finally proven that she was strong. She wanted to repay him somehow. Problem was how? She couldn't think of anything other than maybe buy him a volume of Icha Icha, but something told her for a man who read them so avidly, he probably already had them all. Thus she had resorted to just hanging around him at his training ground in hopes of maybe finding out more about him so she could think of a suitable gift. _

_At first she just sat around watching him train. If he minded her presence at all, he didn't show it. He just continued on as if she weren't there. Before, being ignored would have seriously pissed her off, but with Naruto being gone and things the way they were, she found herself calmer these days. For the most part._

_After the first few days though, she had progressed to engaging in light conversation with him usually about how her medic training was going, the weather, things like that._

_She had never really spent any time alone with the solitary jounin before. Sasuke and Naruto had always been with her. Realizing this, the familiar pang that returned every time she thought about her missing teammates resurfaced. She was grateful that Kakashi was still here with her, even if he didn't acknowledge her presence._

_Ironically, this changed at the end of the first week, when he had asked her if she wanted to help him train. Of course she was only too eager to help out. She didn't really mind being his extra weight during pushups or helping him with his chakra control, the one thing she was better at than him, but a bit of her old self came angrily bubbling to the surface when he wanted to practice throwing kunai at an apple on her head. Despite the fuss she made, somehow he convinced her to do it anyway._

_They fell into a comfortable routine of meeting here on the days that Sakura didn't have medic training at 10 am even though Sakura had taken to telling him to meet her here at 8 that way he wasn't late… by much. They would train for a few hours, then take a break to eat lunch, then train until about mid afternoon, all the while Sakura would just talk about random stuff, nothing too serious. Kakashi didn't say much outside the occasional "hm" or grunt. Sakura didn't mind. The days were slow, but it was nice._

_Nothing noteworthy happened until a few weeks later._

_While eating lunch back-to-back (a system Sakura had suggested so that they could eat together while still honoring Kakashi's wishes to not expose his face) under the cherry blossom tree one afternoon, Kakashi said something unexpected._

"_Sakura?" Kakashi asked staring up at the clear blue sky._

_Sakura had been busy trying to pick up a piece of pork with her chopsticks. "Hn?" she said finally getting it._

"_You don't have to keep coming here if you don't want to."_

_Sakura hardly noticed when the pork fell from her chopsticks and back into the soup with an audible plunk. Damn it. She sighed and set the chopsticks to the side. There was no point in lying to him. Sakura had always been a terrible liar and besides, Kakashi was too damn perceptive._

"_Well, I'll admit that at first I only came because I felt obligated to you after what you did for me. But then, after awhile, I started really looking forward to our training sessions. Really," she added to try to get across to him that these meetings were for the most part wanted. "I completely forgot my original reason for coming. I'm sorry I didn't tell you." Sakura said wistfully hoping that he wouldn't be so angry that he told her to never come back. She wasn't sure if she could handle that._

_When Kakashi didn't say anything, Sakura just had to ask, "Are you mad?"_

_This surprised him. "Why would I be mad?" he asked genuinely curious as to why she would think that._

"_Because… well because I sort of lied to you?" she said sheepishly. Through her eyes, that is how she saw this. She didn't tell him the truth of why she was coming. Not telling the truth equaled lying in her mind. Simple._

_He laughed. The vibrations sent through his back to hers eased some of the tension out of the atmosphere._

"_You didn't lie to me. I figured there had to be some other reason why you willingly came here as I'm sure it wasn't for my conversational skills," he said thinking he could probably count the times he spoke more than one word to her on one hand._

_Sakura laughed too. "I like that about you though. I can say whatever's on my mind without worrying about what you'll think of me. The silences weren't awkward either. They were kinda… nice?" she said for lack of a better word._

"_Oh, well, that's good. I was beginning to think that you thought I wasn't really listening. And as for doing something for me in return… you already have," he said lightly, rubbing the back of his head._

"_Eh? What's that?" she asked, surprised because she didn't remember getting him anything._

"_You kept me company," he shrugged as though it should be obvious. In a way, her company and just general presence had taken away some of the sting of loneliness that Kakashi had lived with ever since Obito's death._

"_My company? You call that a gift? But I didn't even mean to- it doesn't count if I get something out of it too," she said honestly. If she enjoyed his company, silent as it was, then it didn't count as a true gift because she got something out of the deal too._

"_Sakura, there's nothing wrong with enjoying giving a gift to someone. Or in this case, enjoying the gift with someone. If all people were like that, do you think any gifts would be meaningful? Do you think people would genuinely enjoy receiving a gift if they knew that it was a hassle for the person giving it to them? The best kind of gifts are the ones that make both people happy." Kakashi said thoughtfully, picking a piece of grass of his clothes._

_Sakura was stunned. That was probably the most he had ever said to her all at one time, excluding mission briefings, and definitely the most profound._

"_I never thought of it that way," she said truthfully, chewing her bottom lip._

_Kakashi said nothing and they just sat there in a comfortable silence._

_The silence was broken a few minutes later when Sakura said suddenly, "What am I to you?" She purposefully avoided addressing him in any way. She wanted to know what he thought first._

_To say the question had taken him by surprise would be an understatement. Kakashi had never really thought about it before. Her presence had always seemed so natural to him that he never stopped to think about it. Up until a few months ago she had been his student, but what was she now?_

_Pausing to think for a second, there was an uneasy silence as the question just sort of hung in the air._

_Well, for one thing, he trusted her. Not as you have to with a comrade, but really genuinely trusted her. That was a start. He was comfortable around her and had even began welcoming her presence here. Though he had only noticed it a few weeks ago, he realized that he felt a bond towards her as she was the only other person to really understand the pain of trying to fill the hole that Sasuke and Naruto had unintentionally left in their lives. As though a veil was suddenly lifted from his eyes, he finally understood._

_He got up and crouched down in front of the nervous looking girl. She looked up at him with apprehension in her soft green eyes as though she were afraid of what the answer would be. In actuality, most of the courage she had mustered up just to ask the question had dissipated, leaving her almost wishing she had never ask the stupid question in the first place. She listened tentatively._

"_Why you're my friend, of course, Sakura," he said looking into her eyes as they lit up with comprehension._

"_Really?" she whispered. She could hardly believe it. In all the years she had known him, she had never imagined it possible for this to happen. He had always been so distant, not just with her, but everyone. From a man who didn't seem to have any real friends, acquaintances yes, but not friends, being told she was one of his was…_

_A tear slid from her eye and she smiled up at him. He would probably never know how much this meant to her._

_He nodded and his eye curved in a smile._

_From that day forward, they had made it a habit to seek the other out and meet here when not out on a mission or medic training. It was an unspoken agreement to never bring up why this was for both knew why. There was no reason to mar its sanctity by speaking it aloud. Sakura sought comfort in her old teacher in an attempt to hold on to the precious memories Team 7 had shared before it all went wrong and Kakashi needed the constant reminder that not everything he touched turned to ash. Though he pretended like he only did it for Sakura, he couldn't deny the truth._

_It was as much for her sake as it was his.

* * *

_

Running her fingers lightly along the sharp edge of the memorial, Sakura remembered how much she had needed it. Back then she had only known that when she was around him, she felt better. She hadn't understood the complex nature of the situation. Naively, she had thought she just liked his company and she hadn't realized that she had been trying to preserve the bond that she had once had with her team by clinging to the only piece left in Konoha. The two holes left in her heart by Sasuke and Naruto's absence would never disappear until those two pieces came back into her life, but the time she had spent with Kakashi had helped to fill the void, if only slightly.

As her fingers swept over the two names that had brought her out, she sighed. It was ironic really. That it had taken these two people's deaths to finally get him to…

She sighed again, her eyes glazing over.

At the time, she had thought that fate was cruelly laughing at her. It was not the way she had wanted to find out. She had wanted him to tell her when he was ready to, not because fate had decided to screw with her.

She smiled bitterly.

* * *

_She was running up the stairs to the Hokage tower._

_She had been cleaning up around her house so that it looked in tip- top shape when her parents returned. She hoped that they had cooled down enough upon their return so that she could apologize. They had gotten into an argument right before they had left. This was the first time they would be leaving her at home alone and they were worried about her. She had gotten angry at them saying she could take care of herself just fine. She wasn't a baby anymore. She was a chuunin for Christ's sake! Looking back now, she realized that they only cared for her and she felt ashamed. So she was trying to make it up to them. She had gotten the house nearly spotless when she had received a summons from the Hokage. It had been stressed that this was urgent and so the now 15 year-old chuunin had slipped on her black sandals and matching shin guards and shot off across the rooftops of Konoha. _

I wonder what could have been so urgent that Tsunade-shishou couldn't have waited another two hours. I was supposed to meet her for training then right?_ Sakura wondered to herself. An idea struck her then as she reached the top of the stairs. _Maybe it's a mission!_ She thought gleefully. Excited, she turned the knob to the Hokage's office._

_Her current state of euphoria quickly turned to one of apprehension as she sensed the silent tension in the air. What really got her though was the sober look on her shishou's face. Quietly closing the door behind her, Sakura crossed the room and sat in the lone chair directly in front of the Hokage's desk._

_The solemn blond just stared into her apprentice's eyes for a moment, studying her. This did nothing for Sakura's nerves as she fidgeted with the end of her medic skirt._

_Finally, Tsunade broke the silence._

"_Sakura," she began not taking her eyes off the girl before her, "I wish that I didn't have to be the one to tell you this, but I think you would appreciate hearing it from me first, as someone who cares for you," she added carefully._

_A knot began forming in Sakura's stomach. Something was wrong. _So that's why I've been called here, she thought forlornly.

_Noticing the girl's lack of any type of reaction, she continued, slowly for Sakura's sake, "At 5:27 this morning, I received word that a convoy with two ninja escorts was attacked 3 miles south of the Fire Country border. The ninja engaged in battle and the convoy escaped thanks to the ninja escorts. Unfortunately, the two Konoha ninja were forced to lay down their lives to successfully complete the mission." She paused then, hoping beyond hope that she didn't really have to say next what she knew she did. _

"_The two ninja… were your parents." She said quietly, looking away, bracing herself for an explosion that was surely forthcoming._

_But it never did._

_Sakura just sat there dumbly._

My parents? Gone? No way. That couldn't be true. This wasn't right. Maybe whoever had told Tsunade was mistaken. There was just no way that her parents could be… dead._ Sakura shook her head smiling. She looked up at her worried shishou and simply said "No."_

_Tsunade sighed. It was always the ones who refused to believe the truth that were the hardest to deal with._

"_Sakura, I know this is hard for you. Right now you're probably thinking that maybe there's been a mistake, right? I know you don't want to admit it, but your parents are de- gone. Their bodies were identified by the ANBU that were sent out to retrieve them," Tsunade said, careful to stay clear of the "D" word._

"_No. You're wrong!" Sakura shouted abruptly, standing and knocking the chair over as a result. "Why would you lie to me?" Sakura almost hit her startled master. She knew it wasn't Tsunade's fault, but she was the one who had told her. It hurt, just knowing that Tsunade had only tried to tell her as a friend before she found out from someone else. But what hurt the most was that she could tell by the look on the strong blond woman's face that it was true._

_She couldn't deal with this right now. She had to go. Somewhere, anywhere. _

_She leapt through the open window to the side of the Hokage's desk and disappeared onto the streets below._

_Tsunade sighed and rubbed her temple. She knew that there was nothing more that she could do for the girl who was like a daughter to her. What she needed now was time. Time to think things through rationally and calm down. Then, and only then, could she begin to heal. That was when she needed a comforting shoulder to cry on, a gentle embrace to let her know that she was not alone._

_Tsunade knew why Sakura had reacted the way she had. When faced with the death of a loved one, Tsunade herself had reacted the exact same way. If you admitted that someone you loved was gone… then they really would be. It was just easier to pretend that it wasn't true._

_She pulled a bottle out from underneath her false drawer bottom. She needed a drink. The alcohol would be just the thing to take the edge off the painful memories of her dead lover._

_She took a huge gulp and ashamed at herself for being so weak thought, _Forgive me… Dan.

* * *

_As Sakura's mind raced with disarrayed thoughts, her legs raced somewhere she wasn't sure of. When she had finally slowed her frantic flight, she realized she had stopped in front of her house. Needing the familiarity of the things inside, she quickly unlocked the door and rushed inside. The door closed with a low click that resonated throughout the house. God, it sounded so empty._

_The once warm, homey air that had permeated her home was now thick and choking. There were no sounds of her father carving away on the birdhouse he had been making for Sakura, no smells of her mother's delicious cooking wafting in from the kitchen. There was nothing._

_Suddenly enraged at the clean, pristine state of the house, a state she had been proud of only hours before, she started smashing and tearing and breaking everything she could get her hands on. It wasn't fair. Why should the house where they would never live again look so perfect when everything was so utterly and absolutely wrong? The house deserved to look how she felt… a complete mess._

_She screamed in frustration at the world. She knew she was acting like one of those crazed and deranged patients she had passed by so many times in the hospital's psyche ward and looked down upon, but right now she didn't give a damn. Something about this erratic, barbaric release felt good. So she continued until she was utterly spent._

_Whether it had been hours or mere seconds, she couldn't tell as her blind rage began to subside. Wiping some tears away from her red and swollen eyes, she tried to calm her ragged breath. Her hair was a tangled mess and she had somehow managed to cut herself as there was a deep gash on her right arm. Her headband had fallen lopsided over one of her eyes. As she reached up to fix it, she stopped. She knew where she wanted to be.

* * *

_

_He had been taking a nap on his couch, ever-present orange book draped over his face, when he heard a thud._

_No. Not just a thud, but a knock. A knock on his apartment door._

_Not even bothering to get up, he hoped whoever it was would just go away. It was probably just one of the Hokage's little lackeys come to make him do more work. Picking the book up off his face, he rolled over onto his side._

_The knocking persisted although it was getting weaker. Maybe the person was getting tired of waiting, but knocks normally got louder the more irritated the person got. Blearily, he opened one eye. He was just about to close it again when heard a small "Kakashi?" coming from the other side of the door. He blinked … twice. He knew that voice._

_Jumping up from his spot on the couch, now fully awake, the swiftly walked to the door as Kakashi never ever ran anywhere._

_Jerking open the door, his heart almost stopped at the piteous sight before him. Sakura stood leaning against the door frame as though she couldn't even support herself. Though her face was dry, he could tell that she had been crying. Stunned, he couldn't even bring himself to ask how she knew where he lived._

_They stared at each other for another moment before Kakashi finally got his wits about him enough to step aside to let her in. She smiled pitifully up at him as she gratefully stumbled into his small apartment. Closing the door behind her, Kakashi turned around to ask why she was here. But before the words even had time to leave his mouth, he found himself watching as the pink-haired girl fell pitched forward, unconscious. He caught her before she hit the ground._

_Scooping her up in his arms, he set her on the couch where he had been only moments before. After making sure that she was just asleep, he sat back down on the armchair directly across from her exhaustedly._

What could have been so bad as to make Sakura cry?_ He thought miserably. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen the strong-willed girl cry, not even when Naruto had left. Sasuke, as he hadn't been there, he wasn't so sure._

_As with all questions into the female psyche, he turned to his ever-reliable orange covered books._

_Not the best idea, he knew, but it was the closest thing he had._

_Picking up a volume that he remembered had been particularly touching, he sat back down in his chair an leafed through it._

_Ah! There it was._

The woman was crying into Junko's chest, clutching fistfuls of his shirt to her face. He placed his hand on her shoulder comfortingly and wrapped his other arm around her. Her pathetic whimpers slowed and she smiled up at him. He smiled back. They looked into each other's eyes and leaned down to-

_Ok! That was far enough._

So_, Kakashi mentally listed off in his head, _women like to be touched. Alright, I guess I'll try her shoulder too. Smile and maintain eye-contact._ He nodded to himself, actually glad now that she was passed out on his couch. It gave him time to think. _Maybe I should practice first_, he thought. Normally the thought of touching someone voluntarily would have never even crossed his mind, but this was Sakura, innocent little Sakura, and it looked like she needed it._

_Standing, he walked over and knelt before her still sleeping form. He tentatively reached forward his hand, intent on putting it on her shoulder when green eyes fluttered open._

_There was a moment in which they just looked at each other._

_Finally, she spoke. It was quiet and raspy but there nonetheless. "What are you doing?"_

_He paused. He couldn't very well tell her that he was going to touch her in her sleep. God only knew what kind of thoughts she would have about him then. Things probably beginning with a "per" and ending with a "vert." Tactfully, he said that he was only going to adjust the cushion which thankfully was slightly askew._

_Seeming to find this an acceptable answer, she nodded. Sitting up, she stared eye to eye (literally) with him._

"_I'm sorry," she said quietly, finally tearing her eyes away from him._

_Taken aback, he said curiously, "For what?"_

"_For barging in on you like this. I know how you like your privacy and I- I totally just- without even thinking…" she managed._

"_It's alright. I don't mind."_

_She nodded and released a breath she didn't know she had been holding._

"_Now, will you tell me what this is all about?" he asked carefully not wanting to upset her, lest she pass out again._

_Silence._

Maybe that was the wrong thing to ask?_ He thought absently._

_It was now or never Sakura decided. If she was going to tell him the truth she better do it now before the courage she had just gained back in her sleep wore off. She breathed in slowly._

"_My parents are d-dead," she managed with only the bare minimum of difficulty._

_Kakashi didn't know what to say. He had always heard people say that they were sorry in times like these, but the sentiment just didn't quite seem to cut it now. _

_So all he said was "Oh."_

"_Before they left, we had a f-fight. And I-I said some things that were just so awful to them! All they did was care about me. B-But now I'll never-," she broke off suddenly exhausted._

_Awkwardly, he placed a hand on her shoulder. Surprisingly, it worked. She relaxed a little under his touch. Taking a step further, he wrapped his arm around her in a hug. Probably the first hug he had ever given someone._

_Shocked, but pleased nonetheless, she returned it gratefully._

_They sat there in a companionable silence until Kakashi spoke again._

_He had always been adamant in his belief that his past was his own. Not to shame others with its memory. He would continue to bear the burden of his shameful past alone, much as he had always done. It was strange that now of all times, in the warmth of Sakura's embrace, that he found his resolve was wavering._

_Sakura had her own worries and pains to bear, she didn't need his too. Although that was what made the most sense logically, he felt compelled beyond reason to do it anyway. What good would telling her that he knew the pain of losing his parents too do for her? Did he think it would make her feel better? He knew Sakura. And he knew that if she knew he was suffering inside, she would make it her personal mission to do everything in her power to make him feel better. It was what she had always done, it was just who she was, but it wasn't about him. She needed to be the one who was comforted this time. _

_Sakura rested her head in the crook of his neck and sighed contently although the remnants of sadness still lingered around the edges of her voice. This small action pushed Kakashi over the edge of reason. He had decided._

_She needed this._

_Swallowing his stubborn pride, he leaned forward ever so slightly placing his masked mouth near her ear._

"_I felt the same way… when my parents died," he said quietly, his voice so deep she barely heard him._

_Unseen to him, Sakura's eyes snapped open and her breath caught in her throat. Kakashi had never spoken of his past to her. Never. Even though their friendship had only grown stronger in these past two years, Sakura had wanted him to tell her when he felt comfortable doing so. The knowledge that she may have unwittingly forced him to share a part of his past with her made tears well up in her eyes._

_He had felt the hitch in her breathing against his chest and when he felt her warm tears on his shoulder, his heart wrenched painfully. He had gone too far. He should have never- what was he thinking? Maybe he had only been being selfish again. Maybe the real reason he had told her was just to assure himself that he wasn't afraid of being vulnerable. That he wasn't afraid of being of being hurt by this weeping young woman in his arms. But the truth was… he was. He was scared to death by it._

_Sakura pulled away from him then. He was surprised at how much he missed her warmth already. She wiped away her tears with the back of her hand and just stood there trembling for a moment. When she finally spoke, it was in a voice so thin, it was as if it would fade away any second now._

"_Why?" she sobbed shaking her head slightly. She had meant to ask him why he had told her something so personal, but "why" was all that she seemed able to choke out at the moment._

_The question was vague and they both knew it, but Kakashi had assumed she had meant why had he felt that way when his parents died._

"_My father killed himself right in front of my eyes. I was only eight years old at the time. He died believing that I h-."_

"_You don't have to tell me this if you don't want to," Sakura cut him off quickly. She knew he didn't like to openly divulge his private information and this was about as private as you could get._

"_It's ok. I want to," Kakashi said smiling softly at her though she could barely make it out in the dim lighting of the room. The sun had already gone down and the only light in the room was coming from the streetlamp only just visible through the window._

_She nodded slowly as though signaling for him to continue._

_Kakashi started again._

"_My father died believing that I hated him. My mother died of depression shortly after but I was too wrapped up in myself to even go to her funeral. I couldn't stand the pitying looks people gave me wherever I went. It was something that I regret now but I can't change it. Not now, not ever. You're not alone Sakura. It'll be ok."_

_And despite all the pain in her heart, she believed him.

* * *

_

_Sometime after, Kakashi smiled, looking down on Sakura's sleeping form curled up beneath his green shuriken-print blanket. She had fallen asleep soon after his confession with her hand clasped in his. He had been just about to sit back down in the armchair across from her, when he felt a familiar chakra signature outside his door. Not wanting the knock on the door to wake the slumbering girl, he swiftly opened the door before the person on the other side could knock._

_Standing with his fist raised comically to the door that was no longer there, the startled man with dark hair and a bandage across his face quickly recovered. He was all business once again._

"_Hatake Kakashi, you are hereby issued a mission under the order of the fifth Hokage." Kotetsu said in monotone. "Due to the nature of this mission, you will leave immediately after briefing. You will not be permitted to return here, so I suggest you pack now. You will be gone for one month. I will allow you a few minutes for that before I accompany you to the Hokage tower." He stopped then. He knew that he was in no position to be ordering the great copy-nin around as he was his superior, but as one of Tsunade's errand boys, he did whatever she told him to do. The man sighed. What he wouldn't give to switch places with Izumo right now. _

_Kakashi deftly gathered his things into his pack. To be called out on a month long mission now of all times just seemed cruel. Not now. Not when Sakura needed him. If he left now, she would probably never forgive him. To her it would feel like he had betrayed her trust, leaving her when she needed him. Just like Naruto. Just like Sasuke. But it was the Hokage's order and as a Konoha ninja, he was obliged to answer. He glanced over to Sakura's softly smiling face. _

_Having finished packing, he set his bag down. He rummaged around in one of his vest pockets, pulling out the little object he had been looking for. Pacing over to where Sakura slept, he clasped the delicate golden chain around her neck, careful not to wake her. Though he had never been one to keep things for sentimental value, he had never been able to bring himself to throw out his mother's old necklace._

_Picking up his pack, he headed out. Pausing in the doorway to take one more look at the girl who had become one of his only friends, he sighed. _

I hope you will understand_, he thought briefly and disappeared into the night.

* * *

_

_When Sakura awoke the next morning, she knew right away that he wasn't there._

_Though she had never been able to sense his chakra unless he wanted her too, she could just tell._

_The house was too cold._

_The comfort and warmth that she had fallen asleep to was long gone with not a trace left lingering. Not wanting to leave her new found sanctuary, she closed her eyes and pulled the blanket that still smelled like him up to her chin. Maybe he would come back if she waited. He was probably just out getting some food as she couldn't imagine the slacker to be much of a cook. Or maybe he was just out training. Yeah that was it. Despite these rational and completely plausible explanations for his inherent absence, she felt a sense of foreboding. In an attempt to quell these pessimistic thoughts, she rolled over, almost falling off the couch when she felt something hard under her shoulder. Opening her eyes, she was surprised to find a gold chain with a small sapphire attached hung around her neck. _Why would Kakashi-? _she began to question. Suddenly it hit her._

_Sakura had always been one to listen to her heart as it had never once led her astray but, fingering the small trinket, she tried desperately to deny what it was telling her now.

* * *

_

Slamming both hands down on the memorial, pink head hung, Sakura tried to still her shaking body. She was furious to find that the wounds that she had tried so hard to heal were still glaringly present. Even after all this time, she could still feel the aching emptiness of being completely and utterly alone. The tears that she had been desperately trying to hold back, squeezed out through her eyes and fell onto the polished black stone below.

She cursed herself for being so weak. She hadn't realized how much had changed between her and the silver-haired jounin. If her tears were any indication, it was a not something she had wished to dwell upon. But she found herself thinking anyway, what had happened to them? Why were they like this now?

When her quaking sobs had finally ebbed, she looked up at the sky. With the rising sun, the sky had been splayed across with hues of pink and orange. It was beautiful. She wondered if he was looking at it too. Closing her eyes, head tilted up towards the sky, she hoped that somehow her thoughts could reach him.

She missed him.

_Kakashi…_

* * *

A/N- 

Yay I finally finished my first chapter! And it only took… 4 days!

Sorry about any spelling/grammar/formatting errors, I've read through this thing so many times checking for things like that that I'm sick of my own story. Lol.

I don't particularly find this chapter funny and I like funny, so you can look forward to some of my twisted humor in future chapters.

Well that's about it. Please review because I'd like to know what you thought of my story thus far.


	2. Girl

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, why would I be writing a FANfic? Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto, damn genius…

P.S. Sorry if the flashbacks are getting annoying, but they become a really important part of the story later so please just hang in there…

**Bleed for Me**

Chapter 2: Girl

As she walked back through the woods, it started to rain. Despite the fact that she was getting soaked, she laughed softly. She preferred the rain anyway. It made her feel as though the very memorial were sad to see her go.

She shook her head of dark pink locks just before leaving the cover of the woods. Along with the stray droplets, she also flung away her anguished demeanor. No one had ever seen her like this. She couldn't allow anyone to see her like this, pitiful and weak. It was a side of her that she only showed to the cold, silent memorial.

She had always been the one that people came to when they needed help. Whether it was simply the comforting words of a friend sought or something more serious, like the healing of a fatal wound to save their life, people had always needed her, her strength. What would they do if they found the pillar that they had always leaned on broken and crumbling? Who would they turn to then? Sakura only knew that she couldn't let them down. She knew that to help them, she needed to be someone else on the outside. Someone they could always rely on to be strong and composed. Because of this, she would only allow herself this temporary respite when she was alone, far away from judgmental eyes. Only then would she allow herself to succumb to the overwhelming pain in her heart, a heart now beating only for others.

It wasn't that she didn't care about others anymore, in fact quite the opposite. She cared for others so much that she was willing to bear the responsibility of being the one everyone looked to for an answer. In her academy days, she had always been secretly proud of this role. She thought it just meant that she was smarter than everyone else. Now she knew better.

To be the one that everyone depended on was a great burden. To always be there when others needed you. To hide your insecurities for the sake of others. To cry only where no one could see you. And to admit defeat only when no one could hear you. These were the burdens such a person had to bear. Sakura was that person.

She would never complain though. She would continue to smile and be the person everyone wanted her to be. Not because she had to… but because she wanted to.

Ever since she had been a child, Sakura had wanted nothing more than to be strong. And now she was. She was everyone's strength and that only proved to make her stronger. She had always wondered why this was and had come to the conclusion that it made her feel good inside. To be wanted, needed even. She had always been the "weak" one in Team 7, but now she was making something of herself. She was an excellent medic, second only to the Hokage, she could reduce mountains to mere dust in a matter of seconds with her bare fists alone and she had an intelligence that could rival Shikamaru's. With all of these outstanding achievements, one would think she would be proud of herself. She had plenty of merits and awards to her name and was labeled a valuable asset to Konoha. So then why did she feel so empty?

Having reached the part of Konoha that slowly turned from lush forests to small buildings, which steadily grew in size and importance the closer one got to the center of the village, Sakura paused. Taking a deep breath as though to clear away her troubling thoughts, she assumed the role and stepped back into reality.

Or fantasy, as she herself could no longer tell the difference.

* * *

_Thunk_. 

A few seconds passed.

Then _Thunk_.

Silence.

The repetitious sound had been going on for at least an hour, much to the chagrin of the people in the vicinity.

Well, if there had _been_ any people in the vicinity.

Kakashi was sitting with his back to a tree, book out, legs stretched languidly before him. A kunai spun lazily around his finger. Suddenly it cut through the air noiselessly, hitting its mark in the middle of the clearing.

Thunk.

The post screamed in protest, glaring at the absent-minded man who had proceeded to piercing it full of kunai this past hour to the point where the enraged post was barely even visible.

Closing his book, he sighed. He stared up at the sky, taking note of the position of the sun, gauging the time.

He frowned. A gesture that was wasted beneath the cover of his mask. Time. It was all he seemed to have these days. Ever since…

He decided it was time to go. He threw one last kunai.

But this time, there was nothing but silence.

He cursed under his breath. That last throw had reopened the wound on his right side that had only just stopped bleeding this morning.

Clutching his hand to his side, he struggled to his feet. He would have to go home to clean and wrap it again.

His efforts were halted as he heard someone coming. That's right _heard_. Apparently, distracted as he was, he hadn't sensed the person coming. Even though this type of thing, not sensing a person's chakra before they were right on top of you, was fairly common, even among the best, he berated himself for dropping his guard. In his defense though, this wound hurt like a bitch.

Oh well. Too late to run now. He would just have to hide his injury the best he could and hope that the person wouldn't try to send him to the hospital.

Sighing, he turned to face the person.

* * *

Sakura had been walking through the market, which by now was bustling with shoppers as it was now at least midday, when someone bumped into her. The person apologized and continued on their way as did Sakura. It _was_ a busy street after all. 

Sakura reached up to brush away a stray strand of hair that had been knocked lose out of her hitai-ate and started when she felt something wet on her forehead. Looking down at her hand, she was surprised to see a spot of bright red smeared across her palm.

Blood? How did that get there? She asked herself. It wasn't hers, that much she was sure of. But then how did it get on her hand? She thought back to the last time she had looked at her hand. When she had put down the flower back at the memorial to wipe away some dirt that had gotten on her hand from the flower. Wait. The memorial.

When she had slammed down her hand. It hadn't been that hard, so the blood must have already been there. But the rain from last night would've washed it away. So this morning. But who-?

Kakashi…

Sakura's eyes widened.

_Oh of all people, why him?_ Why the one person who she couldn't face? The one person who she was scared to face? The logical part of her mind said that it wasn't her problem. That Kakashi was a grown man and could take care of himself. The stupid part (normally the one she liked to call the "compassionate" part) said, or rather screamed, OH MY GOD!!! Make sure he's okay! Help him! Heal him! Force him if you have to! Just go see him!

Moving so that she was no longer just standing there in the middle of the street, Sakura sighed. While the logical part had a point, as a medic, she was supposed to ensure that all ninja were in optimum health; a responsibility she carried out dutifully to the best of her ability. She liked to think that as a medic, her duties extended to all people within Konoha and sometimes those outside. While that may have been just Sakura's personal views, wasn't it the job of a medic essentially to save people? Enemy or not? It was stupid, she knew, but she couldn't help it. She had seen enough death already and if she could help it, no one else would ever die on her again.

But this… this was something else entirely.

Even though she was probably overreacting, she knew that Kakashi was the type of person to pretend he didn't feel a thing, even though there was a sword sticking out of his chest, just so that he wouldn't have to go to the hospital. And if she did decide to go see him, just to make sure he wasn't inadvertently killing himself, how would she go about doing it?

I mean, what would she say to him? I was worried over a little blood, so I tracked you down like a stalker? Or better yet, I know you're a grown man, but do what I tell you to because I said so? Yeah, that would go over well…

Sakura hadn't even really talked with him in what? Years? Still walking, albeit slowly, she thought back, searching through her memory bank for the last real encounter with the enigmatic man.

* * *

"_The rules are the same as last time. You have 'til dawn tomorrow to get a bell." Kakashi said lightly, holding the two silver bells before them, tauntingly._

_Sakura and Naruto looked at each other and smiled. Things would be different this time. This time… they would so own._

_If Kakashi thought that they were still the same pathetic little genin he had beaten with this trick 3 years ago, he was in for a rude awakening. Working together as though they had never even been apart, Sakura and Naruto instantaneously and non-verbally formulated a plan._

_Sakura would show him. Though the animosity that she had felt towards Kakashi for blatantly abandoning her the night her parents had died had been all but forgotten, she still had something to prove. Having just returned from his supposed one month mission, which in actuality had taken three, Kakashi was out of the loop. Tsunade had indeed told Sakura that he had gone on a mission, details excluded, but the blonde woman had also been enlightening her in a much different way at the same time. She had been teaching Sakura how to release her chakra through her fists. Wink, wink._

_Though she knew this probably wasn't the case, if Kakashi had accepted that mission just so that he wouldn't have to deal with her, she would make him pay. In her childish pursuit for revenge on a certain unsuspecting, silver-haired ex-sensei, Sakura had completely forgotten that he had already indirectly apologized; an apology that was conveniently hanging around her neck, hidden beneath her clothes. Despite this, Sakura was determined to show him just how strong she had become… without him._

_Breaking her out of her inner soliloquy, Sakura focused on the task at hand. _

_Waiting for the opportune moment to strike, they stared at each other, sizing their opponent up. Sakura and Naruto vs. Kakashi-sensei. Sakura's eyes were searching, studying his every movement. There! An opening. As though clueing in to her internal cue, Naruto attacked._

_Starting off with a spray of kunai and showing a mastery of his signature shadow clone jutsu, Naruto seemed to get the upper hand on Kakashi. Unfortunately, as they were about to find out, no one ever_ really_ got the upper hand on the infamous copy-nin. Unsurprisingly, when Naruto thought he had finally got him, Kakashi disappeared._

_Immediately, Sakura began searching for him. Right. Up. Left. Behind. Not a trace._

"_Then BELOW!" Sakura yelled fiercely, gathering up her chakra in her right fist and then releasing it at the precise moment her fist connected with the ground. The ground exploded into upturned chunks and deep cracks, leaving the jounin exposed in the middle of the field._

_Needless to say that got his attention._

_Sakura would've laughed at the comical expression on Kakashi's face, not to mention Naruto's, but, in light of the situation, she settled for a smirk that would've made Sasuke proud._

_A few hours later…_

_Battered, dirty and bleeding, Sakura and Naruto looked like crap, but had never felt better. Grinning idiotically, they each held a bell in their hand. _

"_Wasn't it you _sensei_, who said 'Look underneath the underneath'?" Sakura teased her embarrassed sensei, holding out a peace sign with her right hand._

_Straightening up, he said solemnly "Sakura, Naruto, from this day on, we're no longer sensei and students. Now we're equals."_

_Sakura smiled as she watched Naruto's face light up in excitement. She had wanted Kakashi to acknowledge how strong she had gotten. She had waited so long to hear him say that. For her sensei to tell her that they were now equals meant a lot to her. _

_Her smile fell. Sadly, it would have meant a lot more coming from a friend.

* * *

_

Sakura frowned. Had the last time she had spent any amount of time with Kakashi really been when Naruto had returned? That long ago? No… that couldn't be right. I mean sure the man liked his solitude, but 6 years? No way.

While some may not have found losing contact with someone that unusual, Sakura found it quite disturbing to say the least. He had been such an important part of her life. How could she have let things get to the point where she could no longer even remember the last time she had talked with him? A small pain began tearing at her heart. She remembered this pain well.

It was the pain of loneliness.

Having drifted away from the market, Sakura found herself in a little park. Finding a small bench to sit down on, Sakura mentally listed off some events that had happened, trying to get a little closer to the present. She just couldn't stand the fact that she had allowed such a precious friendship to slowly rot away. She thought harder.

_Ok. Let's see… Um, after Naruto got back, we all left for Suna. But he and I were split up during the mission, so that doesn't count. Hm… what happened when we got back? Oh yeah… Kakashi was hospitalized for a long time 'cause of his mangekyou sharingan. Damn. Alright, a few months after that? Er… I remember Ino saying something about planning a party for my sixteenth birthday, but Kakashi was out on some long, secret S-classed mission or something so he missed it. By the time he got back- Ah! That's right! That was around the same time Sasuke came back! I had to have talked to him then, right?_

She wracked her brain trying to remember what the hell had actually taken place when the illustrious Sasuke had finally made his reappearance in their lives.

* * *

"_-but I think that the spicy udon noodles taste the best with curried pork and …," Naruto rambled completely lost in his blissful train of thought._

_Sakura propped her head up with one arm, chin resting on her palm, and smiled hazily at him. While she tried to look like she was paying attention, for Naruto's sake, she really just didn't care. In fact, you'd be hard-pressed to find _anyone_ who cared about ramen as much as Naruto did. _

_They were eating dinner; albeit a very late one as it was almost midnight, and as usual, Naruto had dragged Sakura to Ichiraku's to eat. Since they had been too tired after sparring that day to even consider getting up to eat lunch, they had skipped it. Looking back, that might not have been such a good idea, as by the time training was finished and they had enough chakra to get up, they were ravenous and neither wanted to go home and cook something. Naruto had "suggested" just getting something to eat on the way home, meaning Ichiraku's. Too tired to argue, Sakura had agreed only because, whether the hyperactive blond knew it or not, he would be picking up the bill._

_Naruto had been back for almost 10 months now and things between them were as comfortable as they had been before. Maybe even more so now that both had finally matured, even though Naruto was still just as goofy and clueless as ever; a fact that Sakura had found that she didn't mind quite so much now, as it made Naruto…well Naruto, although she'd never tell him this. Yes, the energetic blond was still way too hyper, way too loud and still had a serious ramen addiction, but Sakura was grateful for this. She had worried so much that he would change from the friend that she had known before he had left. Thankfully, only a few short minutes after meeting him again for the first time in almost 3 years, her fears had been quickly disposed of. She was glad to find that some things just never changed._

_Naruto had taken to eating lunch with Sakura every chance he could, which was practically everyday, in an attempt to catch up with her on things he had missed during his absence. Naturally, the offer had extended to Kakashi-sensei as well, but the silver-haired jounin had gone off on a mission just two months after Naruto's return. He still hadn't come back yet._

_Though the lunch excuse had worked at first, there was only so much you could miss out on in two years, and so they had run out of things to talk about. Therefore Naruto had assumed the responsibility of starting a conversation so that they didn't have to just sit there in silence. Well, either that or the kid just liked the sound of his own voice…_

_Sakura chuckled a little at this, and Naruto, thinking it had been in response to something he had said, continued on with his "story" with renewed vigor._

"_Yeah, I know! I mean, what kind of an idiot would prefer grilled pork to roasted eel when served on hand-rolled soba noodles? I mean, the guy was totally-," Naruto rambled on, gesturing wildly, noodles hanging from his mouth._

_Before Sakura could correct him in his assumption that she had not been laughing _with_ him, per se, but rather _at_ him, something tickled at the edge of her mind. The kind of tickle you get when something's about to happen. _

_Turning her head around not so inconspicuously, as Naruto wouldn't notice her not paying attention anyway, she looked out past the hanging flaps of the Ichiraku ramen stand and out onto the street._

_At first, there was nothing there. Most normal people would just assume the feeling was simply a fluke or something, but as a ninja, Sakura knew to trust her instincts._

_Staring intently at the dark, empty street outside, Sakura waited. A few minutes passed by with still no sign of anything much less anyone. Though still feeling a little uneasy, Sakura began to turn her attention back to her cold, forgotten ramen bowl when something caught the corner of her eye. Whipping her head back around so hard, she almost sent it spinning off into another dimension, she gasped._

_A group of five or six fully clad, masked and armed ANBU were marching down the street in a tightly-knit circle, as though guarding something. Trying to see just what it was that they were protecting so devotedly, Sakura peered hard into their ranks, even adding a little chakra to her eyes to give her vision a little extra boost. All she could make out was that there was, in fact, a person inside the human-cocoon; and although she wanted to know who, adding any more chakra would alert them to her intentions, which was definitely something she wanted to avoid. She wondered what they were doing, but she didn't want them to know what she had been trying to do._

_Sakura had never seen so many ANBU all gathered together at once… except when something bad was about to happen. Needless to say, something was up._

_Turning to Naruto to draw his attention to the masked men, Sakura gaped. Naruto was frozen seemingly in mid-sentence as his hands were still up and there were noodles still hanging from his open mouth. He looked like he was on pause. Sakura tried calling his name and when no answer was forthcoming, she waved a hand in front of his face. Nothing. Sakura looked around the little stand quickly searching for anything else unusual. Sure enough, the ramen stand owner, his daughter Ayame, and the other two late-night diners were all frozen in their actions, suspended in time. Forgetting about her blond companion for the moment, Sakura rushed outside onto the street. By this time, the ANBU were already long gone. Looking further down the street, she could see that the one or two odd person still out this late was frozen as well. Still staring at the unsuspecting people seemingly frozen in time, she thought. She was pretty sure she knew what this was and she was pretty sure she also knew why. She wasn't a genjutsu specialist for nothing after all. _

_This particular genjutsu was meant to temporarily freeze time… or rather make the targets think that time was frozen. By applying chakra into the intended targets' brain, the user could temporarily stop the mind's functions. Without the mind to tell it what to do, the body shuts down all acts that aren't involuntary actions, such as the heart beat or breathing. While it was originally used as a diversionary tactic to buy time needed to escape, and intended for only one target at a time, mass targeting could occur if combined with other users all casting at the same time. Effects usually only lasted about 5 to 10 minutes, but in a casting of this range, it would probably only last 3. Sakura knew she had always been particularly adept at recognizing genjutsu and therefore not being trapped in them, and for that she was glad, but who could have done something like this? And on such a large scale too?_

_Surely the Hokage would have known about this. There's no way that something of this magnitude could slip past her keen eyes, so why did she let it go on? Unless… she was in on it. Or rather, being the Hokage as she was, had been the one to order it. It didn't take a genius to figure this one out, even though there were plenty readily available in Konoha. _

_Clearly, Tsunade didn't want people to know about the person who had been being guarded by all those ANBU. Her curiosity peaked. She was going to find out what was going on._

_Naruto now completely driven from her mind, Sakura raced toward the Hokage tower. She wanted answers and what better place to get them than the gambling addicted, criminal mastermind herself?_

_Running silently through the night, high above the streets of Konoha on the rooftops, the pink-haired chuunin stared at the tower looming ominously ahead. Suddenly, she sensed someone's eye on her figure. Turning her head slightly, she glanced behind her. Though she thought she saw a flash of silver disappear into the darkness, it was gone before she could really focus on it. Brushing it off as just the moonlight reflecting off of something, she reached the tower in the center of the village. _

_Busting in through the window, a habit she supposed she had picked up from Kakashi, she hoped her shishou wouldn't be too angry at the sudden intrusion._

"_I was wondering when you'd get here," the blond said from behind her desk, not seeming to be the least bit surprised. _

"_You knew I was coming?" Sakura asked wondrously._

"_Well sure. I knew you wouldn't be fooled no matter how advanced the genjutsu. You are __**my**__ apprentice after all," Tsunade said, elbows on the desk, hands clasped in front of her face, as she stared at Sakura smirking._

_Sakura would've beamed with pride at her shishou's praise, but she had caught the fact that the older woman had really sort of been praising herself in a way._

_Shaking her head slightly, Sakura decided to get straight to the point._

"_What's going on?" she all but demanded._

_Deciding now was not the time to play dumb, Tsunade asked, "What do you know?"_

_Taking a deep breath, Sakura said quickly, "I know that you had some ninja cast a wide-ranged genjutsu so that those ANBU could pass through the village without being noticed. I also know that they were guarding someone. Someone you don't want people to know is in the village. Am I right so far?" she asked even though she knew she was._

"_Yes," the woman said briskly. She had to hand it to the girl though, she had some pretty good deductive abilities._

"_Well, aren't you going to tell me who it is?" Sakura asked, beginning to get a little anxious. An anxiousness that was only increased when she sensed a shift in her master's demeanor._

_Her shishou sighed and picked at her fingernails, visibly diminishing her authoritative presence before her. Sakura tensed a little at this; the woman loved her power to boss people around, and for her to tone it down for her made Sakura think that she was attempting to lessen the impact of the words she was about to speak. The last time Tsunade had done this had been when she told Sakura that her parents had died. Sakura desperately hoped that it wasn't something bad again._

Why is it always me who has to be the one to tell Sakura these things?_ She thought dejectedly._

_Finding that she could no longer stall for time, Tsunade said it quickly hoping that Sakura was ready. _

"_It's Sasuke."

* * *

_

_Sakura just stood there._

_Something was just not clicking right in her brain. Suddenly sucking in a huge amount of air, as she had realized she hadn't been breathing, her brain began working double-time. _

Oh My God. Sasuke's back? Who-? Wha- How? When?_ Well, she knew when, but-, Sakura's head was spinning. As much as she had wanted to believe that Sasuke would one day come home, she hadn't thought it would be like this. She had always imagined Naruto and her to be the ones to bring him back. After all this time, it all just seemed so… surreal._

_Eyes still flickering back and forth rapidly in a chaotic representation of her scattered thoughts, Sakura managed to blurt out the most important question._

"_Why?" she squeaked, her voice cracking under the pressure of her raw emotions._

_Tsunade, who had been watching the girl's face reflect the various stages of inner turmoil raging just below jade eyes, was snapped back to attention._

"_It's a long story…" she trailed off, knowing full well that Sakura would sit there forever if need be._

_Sakura looked up with such a look on her face as to confirm the Hokage's suspicions._

_Beginning, she said, "Do you remember a few months ago, when I told both you and Naruto that Sasuke had defeated Orochimaru?" _

_At the sound of Naruto's name, Sakura slunk down in shame, knowing that she had just left the poor guy there without even releasing the jutsu. She promised to go back to get him and tell him the news as soon as possible. This was probably even more important to him than it was to Sakura… and that was saying a lot._

_Focusing on the present, Sakura nodded. How could she forget? She had felt such elation at the fact that Sasuke could finally come home. A happiness that was destroyed a second later when the very same woman had told her that he wasn't coming back. Afterwards, she and Naruto had spent the entire day lost in a daze, both equally ecstatic and terrified._

_Continuing, Tsunade said carefully, "Well, he did… in a sense. Sasuke _had_ successfully destroyed Orochimaru's body, but Orochimaru's spirit still dwelled inside the curse seal on Sasuke's back. She paused here, taking things slowly so that Sakura had time to let things sink in._

"_Sasuke knew that if left unchecked, it would eventually overcome him. So disguised as a mere merchant, he set about finding a way to stop it, once and for all. In the months following Orochimaru's defeat, Sasuke traveled around, searching for any information he could get that would lead him to a solution. While in Waterfall Country, a small country that specializes in the healing arts just north of here, he came across some information regarding a famous medic. After hearing about some of the things this medic could do, he decided to look into it. The more he learned, the more convinced he became that this was the answer he had been looking for. This medic was said to be able to cure almost anything, was the second best in all the world, and… had trained under the legendary Sannin Tsunade," she paused here again, waiting for her words to hit home with the rapt girl sitting before her. When it did, the girl's eyes widened._

"_Me?" Sakura gasped incredulously. "But what good am I to-…I couldn't possibly-."_

_Tsunade cut her off. Honestly, sometimes the girl was just too damn modest for her own damn good. "Nonsense. Aren't you the one who found a cure for a poison that people said was incurable? Aren't you the girl who went up against a member of the Akatsuki and won? Aren't you the girl who became my very own apprentice and will someday soon surpass even me?" Tsunade said the last part with a smile. It was true, and about time someone laid it all out for her._

"_Well, yeah but I had help with Sasori and-," she caught herself at the implication of Tsunade's words. She gaped. _

"_Do you really think so?" she asked quietly, not fully willing to let herself get her hopes up if Tsunade was just saying it to make her feel better._

"_I do."_

_Sakura smiled gratefully. She could only remember one other time in her life when she had felt this good about herself; a time in which someone had called her their friend._

_Not wanting her ego to get too big, Sakura interjected quickly, "But how do you know all this?"_

"_Sasuke told me himself. Well, indirectly at least. How was he supposed to know that his letter would be intercepted?" Tsunade said vaguely._

"_What?" Sakura croaked blandly, willing the woman to explain herself more clearly._

"_When Sasuke found out just who the medic was, he was overjoyed." _

_Sakura laughed at this. She doubted Sasuke had ever been "overjoyed"._

_Looking at her sternly, Tsunade continued. "Like I was saying, after he found out that it was you, he knew things had just become a whole lot easier, as his personal connections and past history with you would make his request much more reasonable. He assumed that as his former teammate, you would undoubtedly accept his proposal to fix his curse seal." Tsunade paused here again._

_Sakura didn't want to mention to Tsunade that Sasuke had been right. She would do everything she could to make sure that that seal would never bother Sasuke again. Not because he would've asked her to, but because she wanted to help him. Just because the one time that she had seen him in the last four years had been unpleasant to say the least, it didn't mean that she didn't still care about him. Although the exact nature of these feelings, she wasn't quite so sure about now._

"_Knowing this, he set about trying to make his request. He decided to send you a letter, as it seemed the best way without having to actually come here, but the letter was intercepted," Tsunade said warily. She knew what was coming._

_Sure enough…_

"_But how? I mean, I hardly believe that Sasuke would allow anyone to know who it was from, and if he was indeed still pretending to be a merchant, I highly doubt that Konoha intelligence would be intercepting his mail, so how was the letter found out about?" Sakura concluded, crossing her arms._

_Tsunade sighed. Maybe Sakura had a future in ANBU torture and interrogation…_

"_It wasn't _his_ mail that we've been intercepting…" Tsunade trailed off anxiously._

"_Then who-?" Sakura began, then stopped. The letter had been addressed to her._

"_You've been intercepting _my_ mail?!?!" she shouted accusingly._

"_And Naruto's," Tsunade piped, as if that would make it ok._

_Calming, Sakura said lowly, "For how long?"_

"_Since the day he left," she said. "It was just a precaution. If Sasuke ever did decide to contact you two through mail, we would be aware of it. It was safer this way."_

_While a part of her agreed with Tsunade, the "compassionate" part was outraged at the total disregard for her privacy. Setting this aside, as it wasn't the most important thing at the moment, Sakura continued, "Ok, so you intercepted the letter. But how did you find him?"_

"_Ah, that's where things get interesting. Apparently, Sasuke knew the letter had been intercepted, and although it was not what he wanted, he found a way to make it work to his advantage. Knowing that your mail would be watched intently from now on, he sent another letter. This time slipping in little details about his location. While at first glance, we, meaning myself and Intel, thought that we had just gotten lucky in obtaining these clues; but at the same time, we also knew that Sasuke was way too smart to let something like this slip accidentally. Therefore, we deduced that he had put them in there purposefully. Whether it was a trap or not, I had no choice but to send a team of ANBU out there as soon as possible. This lead was too good to pass up," Tsunade glanced at Sakura who looked as though she had already figured all this out. Tsunade, knowing Sakura's intelligence, doubted this was far from the truth._

"_So you sent out a team to get him and what? He just willingly went with you?" Sakura said dubiously._

"_As a matter of fact… yes. It seems that if he couldn't get _you_ to come to _him_, he figured that he would just go to you; and what better way to get back into Konoha, no questions asked, than as a prisoner? Sasuke must have concluded that I would not send ANBU there just to kill him, as that would result in losing his bloodline trait, which is simply too valuable to our village to lose; So I was forced to have my ANBU find him with the sole mission of escorting him back here. Just as his letter had suggested, he was right where he said he would be. What's more, when they came for him, he went willingly. And now he's back in Konoha. This whole thing was orchestrated by him from the beginning. And we all played right into his hands. You know, sometimes I forget that that traitor's a genius," Tsunade concluded bitterly._

_Sakura wasn't surprised at the resentment in her shishou's voice. To have one of your most valuable and promising ninja go run off with your teammate-turned-evil, and know that there was nothing you could do to stop him even when you knew it was coming, was probably almost as painful as what Sakura and Naruto had felt the day he had left._

"_So what now?" Sakura questioned. "Will Sasuke be reinstated?"_

_Tsunade scoffed. "And why, may I ask, would I do that?"_

_Sakura's heart fell, but she was not about to give up. Not now. Not when she was so close to getting him back. Switching to her informative mode that meant business, she began._

"_Because you and I both know that Sasuke's case is exceptional. Although he left the village of his own accord, it can be construed as a means to control the cursed seal, which could have been potentially dangerous to Konoha and its citizens had he not learned to control it. Also, as a result of said means, Konoha's biggest threat has been disposed of, courtesy of Sasuke. That one act alone is probably enough to reinstate him, as a ninja's greatest duty is to protect his village; and what bigger feat to protect his village is there than to remove their biggest threat and enemy? Sasuke has done Konoha a service so great that you didn't even think could be possible of any one ninja, not even Kakashi. There is also the fact to consider that he willingly gave us his location and gave us full cooperation upon his return," Sakura recited, stressing each point as she came to it. She had had a lot of time to think about this, as you could probably tell. _

"_Please, just do this one thing for me and I'll never ask you for another favor ever again. Please? For me?" Sakura finished strongly, appealing to her shishou's soft spot for her, all on top of a rather impressive mountain of facts and substantial support._

_Sakura gave her puppy eyes… just for good measure._

_Tsunade sighed heavily. _This girl is going to be the death of me.

"_Ok. I'll make you a deal. I'll reinstate Sasuke as a ninja and legal citizen of Konoha, with all records of the real reason for his absence erased, and in their place, I'll say it was actually a covert, unranked mission to kill Orochimaru that I sent him on," Tsunade said slowly._

_Sakura's face lit up and she smiled so widely that any doubts Tsunade had had before about this decision were quickly wiped from her mind._

"_But in return…"_

_Sakura listened intently._

"… _don't ever use those eyes on me again."_

"_Yes, Ma'am!" Sakura agreed enthusiastically. She was so happy right now, she would have agreed to any conditions Tsunade might have had._

_Struck that she hadn't thought of this before, she asked, "Shishou? Where is Sasuke?"_

"_Hospital," the woman grunted, still a bit put out that Sakura had won so easily._

_Sakura turned quickly and was already halfway out the door when Tsunade called out, "But he's in lock-down!"_

_Sakura ignored her. She was going to see him. And God help any person who tried to stop her._

_Tsunade waited until the door had fully shut before slumping down in her chair. Had she made the right decision? Seeing Sakura's smiling face made Tsunade want to believe that she had, but what if she was just getting the girl's hopes up? Not about the reinstatement, she _was_ the Hokage, therefore the decision was hers alone, but about Sasuke himself. What if he wasn't what Sakura expected? What if he couldn't be trusted. What if she (Tsunade) had just unintentionally put Konoha in danger? Tsunade couldn't stand to see that poor girl go through more heartbreak if these things were true. Tsunade sighed. She would just have to trust in Sakura's trust of Sasuke. _Damn_. Maybe she was going soft? Nah, she must just have a soft spot for Sakura. After all, her and Shizune were the closest thing she had left to family. _

_She smiled a little at the power the girl had over her. While the facts _had_ been impressive… it had really been the puppy eyes that had won her over.

* * *

_

_Sakura broke through the hospital doors with a loud crash, startling the receptionist. Not stopping to ask, as Sakura _did_ work there, she turned and ran up the stairs and down the hall toward the Spec. Ward (which stood for Special Ward that handled cases like this) where she knew he would be._

Sasuke… hang on. I'm coming.

_Sakura reached the gray, double-doors that had the sign "Spec. Ward above them, and paused panting slightly. Her heart was beating erratically, and Sakura had a feeling that it had nothing to do with her running._

_On the other side of these doors…_

_Sakura was suddenly afraid. What if he didn't recognize her? Or worse, what if _she_ didn't recognize _him_? How much had he changed? Well, no matter what, he's still Sasuke, so… Steeling herself against these negative thoughts, she pushed open the doors and walked through._

_Only to run into the firm chest of an ANBU operative. Looking up, she saw a raccoon mask and a deep voice called down to her, "You're not allowed to be in here. Only the two ANBU guards are allowed. Anyone else must get permission from the Hokage first."_

"_I have permission from the Hokage. I'm Haruno Sakura, her apprentice," Sakura said expectantly, her voice a lot stronger than she felt, hoping that that would be enough for them to let her pass. Wishful thinking._

_The man nodded to his partner, who promptly disappeared in a puff of smoke._

_Sakura gulped. If he was going to check to make sure that Tsunade had really said it was ok for Sakura to be here, then she was screwed._

_He poofed back into the room a second later and nodded back to his partner. Both of them promptly proceeded to exiting the room._

_Sakura gaped. What the?_

_She grabbed one by the arm as he was leaving._

"_What are you doing?" she questioned them._

"_Lady Hokage had granted you permission to see Uchiha Sasuke. She also requested that you be allowed to do so alone. We will be waiting outside the room when you are done." He said briskly and closed the door behind him._

_Sakura shook off the disbelief and smiled. _

Thank you, Tsunade-shishou.

_Turning her attention away from the door, she approached the single bed in the small room hesitantly._

_She stopped at the edge and looked down. _

_Only problem was, her eyes were closed._

Please_, she thought desperately, although what exactly she was praying for could've been a lot of things._

_Slowly exhaling, she peeked open one eye, then the other._

_Nothing could have prepared her for this._

_Her heart jumped, although she no longer felt the butterflies in her stomach that she had felt every time she had seen him when she was younger. Lying there, apparently asleep, was Sasuke Uchiha, no doubt about it. He looked older and his hair was slightly longer, but that was to be expected. No, what really shocked her was his expression. Though his face was ultimately the same, it was darker somehow, angrier. It hurt. _

_Sakura knew that the things he had been through had made him like this, things she would never understand. What she did understand though, was that she wanted to help him. She wanted to ease his troubled mind and let him now that he had people who cared about him. They had been there for him before and were still here for him now. She just needed to make him see this._

_She thought about the selfish feelings she had had for him when she was younger. Feelings that she had given up on when she realized that he could never return them. Though her childhood crush on him had all but disappeared, what was left was a deeper kind of love. It was the same kind of love that she had for Naruto. Not as a lover, but as a friend. She hoped, that in time, he would be able to return these feelings. He was one of the most important people in her life, and though he had been gone for four years, he had made her who she is today. _

_Pulling up the only chair in the room up to his bedside, she stared at his face, as though trying to etch his features into her mind's eye, in case he was ever taken away from her again._

_Suddenly aware of how tired she was, as it was now at least two in the morning, she lay her head down on the side of the bed._

_Just for a minute she told herself and closed her eyes.

* * *

_

_He opened his eyes._

_At first, all he could see was white light. Then slowly things darkened and the glowing abyss was replaced by the image of a hospital room. Understanding dawning on him, he felt a weight on his side. Looking down, his eyes were assaulted by a shock of pink hair._

_He rubbed his eyes._

Pink hair… ?

Sakura…

_He thought nostalgically. As he continued to look down on the sleeping girl, he decided to wake her, as she was making his side go numb._

"_Sakura?" he whispered hoarsely, having not used his voice in days._

_She stirred, green eyes slowly opening to stare into narrowed dark ones._

"_Sasuke?" she whispered, as though any louder and it would shatter the reality of this fragile dream._

_He stayed silent, though giving a small affirmative nod._

_She smiled softly and whispered._

"_Welcome home."

* * *

_

A/N-

Yeah so not a lot of Kakashi/Sakura action, I know, but don't worry it's not a SasuSaku fic after all, so there will be plenty of KakaSaku next chapter.

This one was sort of a transition chapter, explaining some stuff that will be crucial to the story later on. So sorry if it was kinda boring.

Maybe I'll add a little fan service next chapter to make up for it…

So as always, read and review, and I'll update soon.

Oh and thank you to all my wonderful reviewers! I appreciate your compliments! And I hope you liked this chapter, even though I didn't really…

One last thing, the funniest thing happened yesterday. Remember when I said that Sakura's parents had been killed 3 miles south of the fire country border? Well, I just saw a map of Naruto's world and umm… south of Konoha is all ocean. o.O


	3. I Miss You

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, why would I be writing a FANfic? Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto, rich jerk.

Credit for fixing my numerous screw-ups goes to my amazing beta: IcarusT. Thank you, Thank you.

**Bleed for Me**

Chapter 3: I Miss You

_Sakura stared at the screen tediously monitoring Sasuke's condition. The silence of the room was permeated with the steady beeps of Sasuke's beating heart that came at fixed intervals. Sakura's mind began to wander after watching the monotonous line spike, then calm, then spike again. _

_It had been two days now since Sakura had first seen Sasuke and she had barely left his side. He hadn't spoken much_; ok at all_, Sakura admitted to herself, but then again, neither had she. After spending some odd months in the company of a certain silver-haired someone with similar stoic tendencies, she found that she didn't really mind, as she was quite used to it. The silences, while not wholly uncomfortable, were not quite the same as the ones she had shared with Kakashi. While his were of a companionable sort, Sasuke's were a tad awkward; as if she wanted to say something, but didn't quite know what. To put it simply, it was the type of silence you got when seeing someone again after a long time. _

_With Sasuke, there were plenty of things she _could_ have talked about, but she didn't want to rush him. She wanted to take things slow; get reacquainted with him and make him feel comfortable with her again. Or for the first time, as she sincerely doubted that he had ever _really_ been comfortable with anyone. _

_For two days, he had just lay there, not that there was much else he could do what with the chakra depleting bracelet on his wrist, with only the occasional movement, and only once or twice had he gotten up to go to the bathroom. Tsunade had issued a guard to go with him both these times. Although somehow, Sasuke had managed to get them to just stand beyond the door without actually going in with him._

_As promised, Tsunade had not let anyone other than the two guards, herself and Sakura see Sasuke. This was due partly by the fact that only the Hokage, the 6 ANBU who brought him in and Sakura even knew he was here; a fact that Tsunade wanted to keep that way._

_She didn't want anyone else to know Sasuke had returned until it was safe… for both the people of the village and Sasuke himself._

_Until the operation was performed and Sasuke fully recovered, she didn't want anyone else in to see him, not that he himself wanted to see anyone.__ Sakura and Tsunade were the only medics who had gone in to check up on him and were the only two who could anyway. The Spec. Ward was constantly surrounded by a concealment genjutsu, and was therefore only accessible by those who already knew it was there._

_Tsunade hadn't told Sakura this, but there was no way she could just let Sasuke roam free around Konoha without first undergoing some interrogation. She needed to now if he could be trusted and not a liability to the village. While she would try to keep the torture part out, for Sakura's sake, it may be needed if Sasuke didn't comply. But, seeing as how he had cooperated with them thus far, she only hoped that he would continue to do so. She would wait until he was recovered from the operation before subjecting him to this though. She felt bad for maybe raising Sakura's hopes about Sasuke being able to remain in the village indefinitely, but she needed the girl to be as hopeful and determined as possible for the task at hand._

_Sakura sighed. Sasuke was asleep again, or rather meditating as he would never actually fall asleep in front of anyone. She felt nostalgic again as she sat there, staring at the face that she had pined over for so many years. She laughed softly, not really at herself, but at her past self. Being a ninja forced one to grow up fast, and as Sakura had quickly realized, she just couldn't be the same little girl she had once been. Seeing death all around her, of her comrades and friends, had done that to her. It wasn't something she resented; quite the opposite in fact. She was grateful for it. It showed her that you had to cherish and protect the things that were important to you while you could and it had dispelled of all her previous notions of "important". Out there on the battlefield, she had realized that friendship was a lot more valuable to her than a fleeting crush on a boy who no longer existed. For she had indeed realized that the Sasuke that she had devoted her life to was but an idealization. He wasn't, nor could he ever be, the boy she had liked all those years ago. That boy just simply did not exist._

_Though she had tried to keep her laugh quiet so as to not wake Sasuke, his dark eyes snapped open and traveled down to rest on hers._

_Though staring and breathing seemed to be all they'd been doing the past few days, Sakura was still a bit uneasy when he looked at her. Though her heart had always raced before when he looked at her, she was surprised; looking into those intense dark eyes that seemed to be able to see your very thoughts, all she felt now was hurt? Pity? She knew Sasuke would hate anyone who pitied him, but how could she help it? He was as much a part of her as Naruto or… Kakashi, and when they were hurting, so was she. _

"_Sakura?" Sasuke said in a voice much deeper than she remembered. _

_Startled by both this and the fact that this was the first time he had spoken to her, she said quickly._

"_Yes-," she voice died in her throat when she quickly realized she didn't know how to address him anymore. When she was younger, she had always called him Sasuke-kun, but now, what if he thought her endearing honorific was degrading or worse, insulting? She held her breath and hoped that he would just think that 'yes' was all she meant to say._

_Apparently, he hadn't even been waiting for an answer as he began almost before she had finished responding._

"_I need you to do something for me."_

_Although Sakura would've normally asked someone to say 'please' or at least not say it so demandingly, this _was_ Sasuke we were talking about, and she doubted he even remembered how to ask nicely anymore, so she let it slide… this time. She still had her pride after all._

_Knowing what it was that he was going to ask of her, she figured she'd spare him the trouble of explaining it all. From the moment she had heard his request from Tsunade, she had decided to do it, so it seemed silly to make him say it all again when she had already made up her mind._

"_I'll do it," she said determinedly, keeping eye contact with him so that he knew she meant it._

_Not being one to argue about something when he got the answer he wanted anyway, he didn't even bother to ask how she knew what it was that he was going to ask. He knew how. After all, he was the one who had written the letter._

_He nodded curtly and satisfied, he lay back down._

_As his eyes slid shut again, she smiled. She almost wasn't sure why, but just something about the fact that he was here, in Konoha, with her again, made her smile. _

_She wasn't naïve enough to think that things could ever be the same as they were before, but with him here now, it was a start. The two holes that had once been in her heart were slowly being filled again and Sakura was beginning to smile more and more. _

_But something was still wrong. There was still a small twinge in her heart, and it had been bugging her for the past few months now. It felt like the beginning of another hole as it felt just the same as how the other two holes had when they first begun to form, but for the life of her, she couldn't understand why. Her friends had come back right? No more people missing, no more holes. So why did she still feel like a piece was missing?_

_Brushing these thoughts off, she got up from the chair that she had practically lived in the past two days._

"_I'll go see Tsunade now about your request," Sakura said to the passive young man before her._

_All she got in response was a quiet sort of 'uh" muttered from behind closed lips._

_Looking at the dark-haired figure before her, she took a steadying breath. For the first time, he was relying on her. She exhaled nervously._

I hope I can do this…

* * *

_For the first time in days, Sakura went outside. It was only a few minutes walk over to the Hokage tower and Sakura needed the time to clear her mind._

_She had been avoiding going outside for fear of running into someone she knew. Ok, mostly for fear of running into Naruto. While she was holed up in the hospital room with Sasuke, she had had plenty of time for the guilt to set in. Tsunade had specifically told her not to tell anyone about Sasuke's return. At first, she had begged her shishou if she could just tell one person- just Naruto. But she had refused, and had even said especially not him. Sakura was still a little dispirited about that. Now, while Sakura was no longer much of a gossiper, she left that to Ino, she was a terrible liar. If Naruto asked her what had happened that night or where she had been for the past two days, what could she do but lie to him? She didn't like lying, especially to her friends, so she had decided to try to just steer clear of him until she was allowed to tell him._

_It was hard, as he had come looking for her at the hospital numerous times, but Tsunade had already told the staff to cover for Sakura while she was here. Sakura had been using the showers located in the nurse's locker room and had slept in a chair at Sasuke's side to further put off having to go home. As she had pulled a few all-nighters here before, she had some spare clothes in her locker, thankfully. She could just imagine what Sasuke would think, what with this being the first time she had seen him in years and all, if she smelled bad. She was quickly getting sick of the sterile and stifling air that seemed to hang around the hospital though, and she began to understand Kakashi's hatred for the place. One could only take so much before going a little stir-crazy. _

_Though she would never consider staying at Sasuke's side as anything other than something she truly wanted to do, it was nice getting to breath the fresh air again. She smiled contently. She loved the way the cool, crisp morning wind whipped across her face and invaded her lungs as she ran across the rooftops in the early morning. _

_But of course, all good things must come to an end._

_She jumped down from the roof and upon reaching her destination, started up the stairs. After a few short minutes, she was standing before the tall double-doors. She knocked twice and, upon hearing no answer, promptly walked in._

_Tsunade was face down, drooling a little on some papers on her desk. No matter how many times she had seen this sight, it never got old. She cleared her throat loudly and gave the poor woman time to compose herself._

_Tsunade started, and wiped her mouth with her long, green sleeve before finally looking up into Sakura's expectant gaze._

"_Um, I was just-," she began, but stopped when she realized Sakura knew better. Getting straight to business, she changed topics._

"_Sakura. What brings you here?"_

"_I wanted to talk to you about Sasuke's operation. He's finally asked me about it. His vitals are stable, so I see no reason why I couldn't perform the operation as soon as possible," Sakura said, pacing across the room in an equally business-like voice._

"_Ah, yes… that. Well, if you've really decided to go through with it, I suppose it's your call. As one with medical skills that could even rival my own, and one whose professional opinion I hold in the highest regards, I take your word for it. I've told you what you have to do and taught you how to do it, so I suppose that's it then. But still, I will ask you one more time. Are you sure you want to do this?" Tsunade asked genuinely concerned._

_Sakura nodded slowly, but confidently. She knew of the risks involved with this operation… to both the patient and the user. During her training, Tsunade had taught her how to perform the curse sealing technique, just as a precaution. She had explained to Sakura that the basic idea behind it was that the user transmitted some of their own chakra into the seal. This chakra, as it was not a part of the original being on whom the seal was placed, could not be corrupted. It acted as a barrier to the decaying force of the seal, lying dormant until the seal was activated, then sating the cursed seal's chakra requirement, keeping it at bay. While this would not remove the seal, it did stop its progression. _

_Sakura, ever the over-achiever, had taken it a step further. She had devised a way to remove the seal completely, a feat that had stunned Tsunade as she herself had never even imagined doing it. While she had really done it on the off chance that she might be able to help Sasuke, she never imagined it could really help him. Since Sakura had developed the technique, she was the only one at this time who was capable of performing it. Though it had taken Sakura months to research everything and even longer to perfect the technique, she had finally mastered it. _

_The idea had come to her one day while she had been in a depression about Sasuke. She had been thinking about the curse seal and had wondered: if Orochimaru had used his chakra to put the curse seal on Sasuke, wasn't it only logical that removal of Orochimaru's chakra would get rid of the seal? At the time, she had had no idea how to go about doing that, so she had kept quiet, silently researching the mechanics of the curse seal on her own. _

_Though she only had imitations of the curse seal to actually practice on, her technique had worked on them. The technique consisted of sending out her chakra to find and destroy Orochimaru's. If the invading chakra was treated as an ailment or disease, then didn't it make sense to try to heal the "damaged" chakra to fully cure it? Sakura had found that by sending in her chakra to dilute the bad chakra causing the curse seal to stay, the seal could be removed, in theory. _

_So while she could technically remove the seal, it was not without its risks. If the body rejected her healing chakra, the seal would activate and not only suck away all the patients remaining chakra, but hers as well. Needless to say, both involved would die. _

_Despite the risks however, Sakura was confident that this would work. She had to believe that this could work… for both their sakes._

_Getting back to the present, Tsunade sighed, defeated. _

"_When will you be ready?" she asked briskly._

"_I was planning on doing it tonight, if that's alright with you," Sakura half-stated, half-asked._

"_This is your operation, not mine. You don't need to ask permission from me. I have faith in you. I know you can do it," Tsunade said, smiling reassuringly to the girl who was quickly advancing before her very eyes._

"_Thank you, shishou," Sakura nodded, smiling back. It meant a lot to her that a woman as great as Tsunade had acknowledged her in such a way. It had also served to calm her nerves a bit. While she was confident in her own abilities, it helped to know that someone else was too. It was a big risk she was taking and she needed the support. With a small smile, she thought. _

I think I can do this…

* * *

_The sun was shining, there was clear, blue skies and the air was crisp and cool. The day showed no signs of the storm clouds brewing inside Sakura's mind._

_She was wandering. Where… she didn't know. She had just sort of walked off, letting herself relax and enjoy the perfect day before tonight._

Tonight, _she thought almost longingly. That night… everything would change. No matter what the outcome of the operation, everything would change. If the operation was successful, things would slowly begin to go back to normal. Sasuke would no longer be plagued by Orochimaru and Team 7 would be whole again. If the operation failed… well, Sakura didn't even want to think about what would happen if the operation failed._

_She closed her eyes. _

_Just 6 hours to go.

* * *

_

_One eye opened lazily. He was in the ever so nostalgic clearing, under the cherry blossom tree._

_He had been thinking. What about? All kinds of things really. The results of his last mission, what he was going to eat for dinner, whether or not he should blow off training today, did he remember to water Mr. Ukki before he left, things like that. But first and foremost… Sakura._

_Tilting his silver head up to stare at the sky through the cherry blossom leaves, he sighed. The pink-haired medic had been in his thoughts a lot lately. Though he was not the type to let things get to him, nor dwell on any one thing for any length of time, Sakura was different. Though he tried to pretend that it wasn't bothering him, he was too damn perceptive to believe in a lie… even one he fed himself. _

_He had wanted to apologize to Sakura properly upon his return from his three month long mission, but unfortunately, he had just gotten back at the exact same time that Naruto had. While he had been happy to see the energetic blond, it couldn't have come at a worse time. With Sakura focused on Naruto, he had had no time to even talk to her, much less alone and in private._

_So, he had rationalized that he would talk to her when she was alone or some time when she wasn't with Naruto. Again though, his plans had been foiled strictly by the fact that Naruto had hung around her like he was attached at the hip or something. _

_For two months, he had waited for an opening. He finally found it one day when he had spotted her excusing herself for a moment from Naruto's company. She was getting up from the Ichiraku ramen stand bar and, judging by the direction she was heading and the awkward way in which she walked, was probably going to the bathroom._

_He just so happened to have been walking down the street, nose in his book, when he saw her go in to the women's restroom which was conveniently located outside and around the back, out of view from prying eyes. While he knew jumping the poor girl straight out of the bathroom would be highly awkward and weird, he also knew he may never have another chance to talk to her alone. Swallowing his reservations, he started to make his way over to the unsuspecting girl. He had only gone about two feet when someone placed a hand on his shoulder. Turning abruptly to look at the intruder upon his personal space, he was startled to see that it was the Hokage herself. What's more, she had a mission scroll in her hand._

_His eyes narrowed a little bit, as he knew the officious woman never personally went to retrieve people for missions. She had always had one of her little lackeys do it for her. His analytical mind quickly reached the conclusion that this mission must have been very important._

"_Kakashi. Come with me," Tsunade stated firmly if not quietly._

_Glancing back at where Sakura had been, he wasn't surprised to find that she was no longer there. Sighing, he mentally cursed fate or whoever it was up there toying with him. tearing his eye from the spot, he turned and followed the green-clad woman back to the Hokage Tower._

_Sakura would just have to wait a little longer.

* * *

_

_Kakashi frowned, breaking out of his little flashback. The mission as it had turned out, was indeed very important. So important in fact, that it had taken eight months to complete and was ANBU only. Though, he had left the elite black ops even before he had started teaching Team 7, he had rejoined after his team had broken up. It gave him something to do in the absence of his former team so that he didn't have to think about the part that he had played in the team's disbanding. It was actually a rather pathetic reason in his mind, and he was ashamed at himself for it._

_The mission had been top secret, so he had had no time to even explain to anyone where he had gone, though he doubted anyone noticed or cared, so it must have seemed as though he had fallen off the face of the earth. Having just gotten back from the mission three days ago, he was still a little exhausted. The mission without a doubt had to have been the most important one he had ever been on._

_The mission to retrieve Sasuke._

_Breaking him out of his thoughts, he sensed Sakura's chakra heading his way. He stared at the location from which she would emerge. When she did, he saw that her head was down and she looked deep in thought. She looked up at him with glazed eyes and they stared at each other for a moment. He was surprised then when she just continued walking right by him._

_Kakashi's heart wrenched painfully_. Ididn't know she was so mad at me still_, he thought miserably_. For her to just ignore me like that, she must really hate me_ Shaking his head sadly, he thought_, I guess she does have the right to though. I left her all alone when she needed me and almost a year later, I still haven't apologized. God, I'm such a bastard. I don't deserve her forgiveness._ Bringing his hand up to cover his eyes, he hung his head._

_Strangely, this little motion woke Sakura from her thought-induced haze. She looked up at him again, this time with clear eyes. Taking in the sight of him, she thought_, he looks… sad.

_This disturbed Sakura somewhat, as she had never seen her old sensei look much of anything really, well except maybe angry. To see him look so dejected made her heart tighten. She wanted to make him feel better. Slowly she walked up to him until she was right in front of him. She knelt down so they were level with each other, and she placed a hand on his shoulder. _

"_Kakashi?" she whispered softly, not wanting to startle him._

_She had called him by his name… without an honorific. He looked up into concerned green eyes. Wait. Concerned? Kakashi was confused. Are people normally concerned for people they hate? Or was it just a Sakura thing. Now he just had to ask._

"_Sakura. Do you hate me?" he asked so quietly, he wasn't sure if he had actually spoken the words or just thought them_

_Sakura's expression did not change. In actuality, her mind had gone blank_. Did Kakashi just ask if I- hated- him?_ The word was just so out of place in relation to her bond with Kakashi, that even in her mind, she had trouble thinking it. Deciding that she had heard him wrong, as hate was just about the farthest thing she felt for him, that she needed him to say whatever it was again._

"_I'm sorry, but what did you just say?" _

_He mentally cringed. To have to voice his fears not once, but twice, was almost more than he was willing to do. But this was Sakura, and he trusted her. Not only not to exploit his weaknesses, but also to be honest with him. Even though it had been a long time, with him, once trust was earned, it was kept. Though he wanted things to go back to the way they were before her parents died and the night he had left her, he needed to know how she felt. If she did not want the same thing, there was no way he was going to force her just because he was feeling lonely. He had dealt with this loneliness all his life and he could continue to, even if it meant without Sakura. He mentally nodded as though trying to convince himself that his words were true._

_He failed._

_Bracing himself, he repeated, "I said, do you hate me?"_

_She frowned. So he _had_ asked her if she hated him. But why would he think that? I mean, sure she hadn't seen him in awhile and occasionally a little of the residual sadness she had felt would resurface, but it was something she had learned to let go. It wasn't his fault and she knew it. She was no longer a child and so she knew that sometimes things were a bit more complicated than they seemed. Remembering that night, she deftly brought her hand to the little trinket resting just above her heart. Bitterly, she thought how pathetic she was._

_She had been so selfish. Back then she had thought that she had been the victim for being abandoned and that she was the only one hurting inside. Now she saw that Kakashi had been hurting inside far more than she… and still was._

_Lowering her eyes in shame, she whispered, "I'm sorry."_

_His heart fell as she confirmed the fears that had been eating away at him for what seemed like forever_. I guess that's it then. It's over_, he thought pessimistically._

"_Don't be. If I were you, I'd hate me too, for abandoni-,"_

"_-for ever making you think that." Sakura finished, looking up at him once more._

_Kakashi's voice died in his throat, and a strange feeling soared through him. Relief? Confusion? Both? _

_In his practically inebriated state, all he could manage was a small "huh?"_

_Taking a steadying breath, she began. She said it all quickly in one breath, as though afraid that if she stopped to take another, all her bottled up feelings would remain inside her and she would never get to truly tell him how what she felt. Though it had been almost a year, neither of them had gotten over what had happened, and the raw emotions that they had felt were still glaringly present._

"_When I woke up that morning, and you weren't there, I didn't feel anger or resentment to you… that came later; all I really felt then… was sad. I was alone. For the very first time in my life, I was completely alone. I thought then that maybe I had scared you away, and that you weren't coming back. Then all I felt was alone… and scared. It wasn't until Tsunade had told me where you had gone that the fear quickly turned to anger. Anger at you for leaving, but mostly at myself, for thinking that you would ever just abandon me because you wanted to. I nurtured my anger then because it was better to be angry than scared. I was actually scared of being scared. Looking back now, I realize how childish I was. I thought that I was the only one who was so alone, but then I remembered that you too were also alone. I was selfish in thinking that I was the only one hurting and I gave no thoughts to how you must have been feeling. So I want you to know that I wasn't angry at you, and if I seemed angry, it was only at my own selfishness. You only did what you had to do, and I should've understood that. I didn't then, but I do now. I'm so ashamed of the way I've acted that I probably shouldn't even ask this of you, but… can you ever forgive me?" she finished, so utterly spent that she fell forward onto her hands, eyes staring at the ground._

_Nothing, I repeat, nothing had _ever_ shaken Kakashi so much in all his life. The aftershock of Sakura's words was still reverberating around in his head while his mind tried to sort it all out. Behind his emotionless mask, his mind was in absolute chaos. _So all this time, Sakura thought that she was the one who-, and wait she wasn't angry at me? To even think that I would leave-, She was worried about me? Why couldn't I see that she was so alone and-, so she doesn't hate me?_ At this, Kakashi's eyes widened. He played it back slowly in his mind, bit by bit._

Sakura. Doesn't. Hate. Me?

_It was too good for his practical mind to believe. In all his years, he had never had much luck on his side, so for her to _not_ hate him was a possibility that he had not even considered._

_Almost too afraid to ask, he summoned up the courage to form a small sentence._

"_So… you don't hate me?" he asked tentatively._

_She looked up and smiled then. That wonderful smile that only she had that could make everything right again._

"_I could never hate you, Kakashi."_

_Kakashi almost sighed in relief as he felt a weight lift from his mind and the rising of a vaguely familiar feeling. He couldn't quite recall what it was, but it wasn't unpleasant nor unwanted. The situation should have made him uncomfortable, talking like this with anyone, but Sakura wasn't just anyone; she was his friend. Or so he still hoped. He had missed her._

_Referring to her earlier question, he responded with a question of his own, "What would I need to forgive you for?"_

_Smile falling, she tore her eyes away from his curious gaze and mumbled, "For being selfish. I didn't think about how you felt because all I could think about was how I didn't want to be alone anymore. Even now, I still want something from you. I want things to go back to the way they used to be. But, only if that's what you want._

_To hear her echoing the very same sentiments that had haunted his mind before was like a divine revelation. He could've laughed then, but given the circumstances, didn't think that would come across well. He wasn't good with expressing his feelings and sometimes things went horribly wrong because of it. He could not allow that to happen this time. This time was too important for him to screw up. He chose his words carefully._

"_Sakura, everyone's selfish sometimes and that's ok. It's part of what makes us human. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to be alone, so there's nothing to forgive. In fact, in your case, I think you could stand to be a little more selfish. You always put the needs of others before your own, even this time, so I feel bad for asking of you one more thing…" he trailed off then._

_She looked at him anxiously._

"_Your forgiveness."_

_Sakura's mouth hung open a little. She couldn't believe that not only had he forgiven her, but he had asked for _her_ forgiveness._

"_Why-," she began without really even knowing how she was going to finish. Thankfully he cut her off._

"_I never got the chance to apologize to you. Well, that's a lie. I had the chance, but I just couldn't-," he paused, then reiterated, "To apologize."_

_She smiled softly and began unzipping her shirt._

_Kakashi nearly had a heart attack. What was she doing?!?!_

_Before his perverted mind could come up with an answer to that, she stopped and pulled something hanging around her neck forward for him to see._

_It was the necklace he had given her._

_His mouth dropped open a bit, though thankfully she couldn't see that due to his mask. Even after all this time, she still had it? And what's more… still wore it? He was shocked to say the least. But pleased nonetheless._

_Smiling up at him, she said softly, "You already have."

* * *

_

_Sakura smiled. She was lying on her back in the grass of the clearing staring up at the sunny sky. She turned her head to the side to see Kakashi lying in the grass beside her, though he had out his irksome book._

_Yes, those books annoyed her, especially when he read them while she was there with him, but somehow, today they didn't bother her at all. She was far too happy._

_Things felt the same as they used to with Kakashi. After she had made her little confession of wanting things to go back to the way they were, he hadn't said anything, but she could just tell by the way his body relaxed, that he had wanted it just as badly as she. Either neither one of them liked to be alone, or they had just missed each other. Sakura knew that hers was the latter. _

_She just felt so good right now, she almost couldn't believe it. She was relaxed, the sun was shining warmly down on her, and she had her friend back. Yes, even after all this time, she still considered him her friend. _

_Still smiling at him, she watched as the light wind played with his disheveled silver hair. The sun lit upon it in such a way as to make him look practically angelic. Sakura laughed then at the very thought. _Kakashi… angelic. Hah.

_Turning his head at the sudden noise, he raised an eyebrow at the laughing girl beside him._

"_Is there something funny about me?" Kakashi managed to ask with a straight face, although secretly he was kind of amused at her little display of enjoyment, even if it was at his expense._

_Unable to control herself, she blurted, "Everything!"_

_The fake indignant look on his face was almost too much. It sent her into another fit of giggles. Not quite knowing how to respond to that, he settled for ruffling her hair like he used to. It was sure to rile her up more than anything he could've said anyway._

_Sure enough, she scrambled to remove his hand before her hair was messed up. _

"_Ah! No, stop!" she pleaded, though she was still smiling._

_Obliging, he removed his hand and stared down at his book again, though he wasn't really reading it. In fact, he never really read it while Sakura was there, but for some unknown reason, he just liked to mess with her. Just something about the way she acted when she was annoyed or angry reminded him of the way she used to be. Always annoyed at every little thing, she wore her emotions out on her sleeve. She was so lively and playful back then that Kakashi realized that he teased her just so that he could see that side of her again. But, peeking out of the corner of his eye to find her trying to sneak up on him with a silly, mischievous little grin on her face, he found it hard to believe that she had ever really changed at all._

_Not even bothering to lower his book, he said calmly, "You know I can see you, right?"_

_Trying to pretend that she hadn't really been trying to sneak up on him, she resorted to playing with the grass as though that's what she'd been doing all along. Knowing he knew better, she smiled. She just felt so whole again. Eyes widening slightly, she realized that the hole that had been in her heart, the one that hadn't gone away even with the return of Naruto and Sasuke, had been from Kakashi. Apparently, she had missed him just as much as her other two teammates._

_Along with her thoughts of her teammates came thoughts of Sasuke. She had almost forgotten. The operation._

_Gauging the time by the position of the sun, she concluded that she only had about an hour left. All the good feelings that she had felt before were slowly being pushed aside by her feelings of anxiety and maybe even a little fear._

_Noticing the sudden way Sakura's body tensed and feeling the general aura of apprehension coming from her, Kakashi asked carefully, "Sakura. What's wrong?" _

_She looked up then with worry in her eyes. Book lying forgotten in the grass, Kakashi scooted closer to her. Eyebrows furrowed, he asked again._

Oh no! Stupid. Stupid!_ Sakura berated herself for letting her emotions show. She had ruined such a perfect moment with her childish insecurities. And what's worse, she couldn't even really tell him what was wrong. Tsunade had told her not to tell anyone. And unfortunately for Kakashi, he fell into the category of "an anyone." _

_Deciding that she would just have to make something up, she tried, "I- I- umm…"_

_So much for that._

_Not being an elite ninja for nothing, he could immediately tell that there was something that she either didn't want to tell him or _couldn't_ tell him. Something she couldn't tell him… Suddenly it dawned on him._

_Cautiously, he tried, "This is about Sasuke, isn't it?"_

_Trying to keep the utter shock that she was feeling inside from showing up on her face, she tried to play it off._

"_What are you talking about?" she asked as casually as she could._

_Kakashi sighed. So that _was_ it. While he had never really talked about Sasuke with Sakura before, he knew that now was not the time to try to avoid it. He himself wasn't quite sure if he avoided the topic because he felt that he had failed Sasuke and it brought back his guilt every time the dark-haired boy was mentioned, or if he just didn't understand Sakura's feelings towards the boy. While he, and every one really knew how much she had liked Sasuke, he also knew that she had changed, but it was too much to even try to think that her feelings toward the brooding boy had too_.

I guess I'm just uncomfortable talking to her about him_, Kakashi thought, frowning. He liked to think that he was comfortable in all situations, or at least wouldn't let his uneasiness show, but to think that something as simple as this would have him mentally heading for the hills, that made him a little embarrassed._

_Determined to quell his shame, he said, "It's ok, Sakura. I know he's back." _

_She looked at him incredulously. _

"_But how-?" she cut herself off abruptly. Bowing her head, she shut her eyes, furious at herself. She had just let slip that Kakashi was indeed right and that Sasuke _was_ back. Despite her disarrayed thoughts, she managed to rationalize that Kakashi must have known anyway, even before she came, because she had not mentioned the dark-haired boy once, as she herself had temporarily forgotten about him. A fact that Sakura was a bit ashamed of._

_Determined to just sit there in silence, lest she let something else slip, she hoped that maybe he would just go away?_

_Sensing that she wasn't going to say anything more, he reluctantly figured he should explain. Though he didn't think that it was necessarily wise to tell the girl that he not only knew Sasuke was back, but had known even before she that he was coming back, he hoped that she would understand why he hadn't told her. If she didn't, then he at least hoped she wouldn't hit him. He had seen her monstrous strength on more than one occasion, and although he had never been on the receiving end of it, he really didn't think that he could withstand it any more than the mountainside had. Which had been not at all._

_Beginning, he said in a voice more relaxed than he felt, "I was actually one of the… ninja_ _Tsunade sent to retrieve him." He had almost been about to say 'ANBU' instead of ninja, but it was forbidden for ANBU to tell anyone that they belong to the secret organization._

_Pieces falling together almost faster than Sakura had time to understand, a question formed in her mind. _If Kakashi had been one of the ninja to bring Sasuke in, and all the ninja to bring Sasuke in were ANBU, then that meant that…

"_You're ANBU?" she blurted out, pointing a finger at him almost in accusation. _

Damn she was smart._ He frowned a bit under the mask as he knew her analytical skills couldn't be attributed to him. Figuring that it was too late now, and knowing that Sakura would never tell anyone else anyway, he nodded._

"_But when did you join back-," cutting herself off, as this wasn't really important right now, she digressed. "Never mind. It doesn't really matter."_

_Kakashi was grateful that she had dropped it, because if he had told her when, next would have been why. And he really didn't want her to know it was because he had needed something to make him feel useful again. It was a shameful act that he hoped he would never need to tell her. Hell, he wished that even he himself didn't know the reason._

"_So…" Sakura tried, although what it was that she tried, she wasn't really sure. She was just trying to fill the silence as it was making her uncomfortable._

_Breaking out of his thoughts, he focused on the task at hand. Finding out what was bothering Sakura. Looking into her worried eyes, he was surprised to find that he was worried too. It was as though he was because she was. He didn't understand._

"_So about Sasuke?" he prompted and set his hand comfortingly on her shoulder, hoping that that was all he would need to do to get her to open up to him. It had always worked in the past, and he just hoped that it would still work now._

_It did._

_Sakura spilled every thing. From the moment she had seen the pack of ANBU to the moment she had left Tsunade's office that morning. She had told him about the letter and Sasuke's request which had then of course brought up the operation to be done. Then the floodgates opened and all the little insecurities about herself and her abilities, all the worries and fears she had just came tumbling out._

_Kakashi had been listening intently, although calmly to every word that she had said. He had been surprised when she had even included some of her thoughts in the retelling, like what she had felt when she had first seen Sasuke. What surprised him even more than the fact that she had told him, was what she told him._

_She had gotten over Sasuke._

_He almost couldn't believe it. Almost._

_Something inside him had always wished that she hadn't pursued Sasuke like she had, probably because he knew first hand that nothing could ever come about a relationship like that. Thinking back to how disturbingly similar the dynamics of his old team had been to the dynamics of Team 7, he knew that the girl was always the one who got hurt the most. He didn't want Sakura to get hurt, so he had tried to convince her to focus on training more than Sasuke. It was as though he believed that if he could spare Sakura's feelings, it would atone for ever having hurt Rin's. He knew that that was ridiculous, and that he could never make it up to her, but still, he had wanted to at least try. For Rin… and for Sakura._

_He was relieved beyond words that Sakura had finally stopped pursuing Sasuke. What's more, he had even admired her for her strength. To be able to still care for someone who had never once cared for you was something that he believed only Sakura was capable of. That was why she was such an amazing medic… and friend._

_The corners of Kakashi's mouth turned up ever so slightly at this._

"_What if I screw it up? What if we both die? Or worse, what if Sasuke-," Sakura's words broke him out of his blissful reverie._

"_You won't," he said firmly. He was the one who had spent countless nights just lying awake in a pool of his own failure. He was the one who choked when things really mattered. Not her. He wouldn't allow her to. She had all the right skills and an endless amount of potential. She could go on to be the next Hokage if she wanted to, surpassing even himself. And what's more, she didn't even know it. She was too modest and humble and caring. But in his mind… she was perfect._

_Nothing more was said as Sakura got up to leave. It was time._

_He watched her silhouette retreat, outlined in the gorgeous sunset rays. _Just like an angel_, he thought distantly._

_And for the first time in almost a year, he smiled. He was happy again.

* * *

_

_Sakura reached the hospital sooner than she had wanted to. She was standing just outside Sasuke's room door. Tsunade had ordered everyone out of the wing so that Sakura had no distractions._

_Childishly, she cursed the woman. A distraction was just about all she wanted right now._

_Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself as she grasped the handle._

_Horrible scenarios kept playing through her mind. Ones where she failed. Ones where she died. Ones where Sasuke died. The haunting images were flashing through her head in an angry flurry of hate and fear. The images were then accompanied by voices of disappointment and cruel laughter. Sakura brought her hands up to her head in an attempt to block out the noise._

_What was going on? _Somebody… please, help me.

_Suddenly, as though someone had pulled the plug, all the nightmarish images were gone, as were the voices. Only one remained._

_A familiar voice echoed two words around in her head._

'_You won't…'_

_Two words was all it took. Rememebering the absolute and unwavering confidence the speaker of those words had in her set her resolution. She wouldn't let him down._

_Eyes snapping open in determination, her fears had all disappeared, leaving room only for her calm. Her heart had slowed to a steady beating and her pulse lowered back to normal. Her body relaxed in complete confidence. She had no doubts now._

_Pushing open the door, she smirked._

I _know _I can do this…

* * *

A/N- Ah! Don't kill me, but the egotistical, self-centered, lovable bastard that is Sasuke has managed to take up a lot of this chapter, despite only having one line. Lol. 

I swear, sometimes it seems like this story had a mind of its own. If it wants to do something, it does it! It doesn't even ask me for permission! Such was the case with this chapter.

I meant to put a lot more in it, but it all ended up in the next chapter, so umm…

Next chapter:

Sasuke gets his operation!

And drum roll please

I finally reveal what happened between Kakashi and Sakura! Yay!

(To tell you the truth, I didn't even figure out what happened between them until this chapter! Lol. Gomen.)

As always, please review, as reviews are what keep me going. Seriously, they're like my crack. I seem to always post a new chapter after I get 16 reviews. Don't know why, it just happens…

So thank you to everyone who reviewed, and I try to get back to you if you had any questions. Well, any questions that wouldn't be answered in the story later. So yeah, thanks again.

Ja Ne!


	4. Fix You

Disclaimer: I don't own- eh… whatever…

P.S. So sorry it took sooo long to update. I had like two full weeks of AP Exams and college midterms. Then I fell off the face of the earth for awhile to recoup. God, it's a miracle my brain still works…

Congratulations to _mr. uuki_ for figuring out the song for which my story is named: Bleed for Me by Saliva and to _Yunique_ for correctly identifying the first and third chapter songs: ch.1-Hear Me by Kelly Clarkson and ch.3- I Miss You by Incubus. Who will guess ch.2 and 4 I wonder… Oh and _moodiful819_ sorry but you're not allowed to guess for this chapter 'cuz I think I already told you what it was…

So here it is chapter 4, 2 months in the making. Oh and there's this one scene that's kinda gross but it needed to be there so just uh yeah…?

**Bleed for Me**

Chapter 4: Fix You

_A drop of sweat rolled off the side of her face and hit the floor. It was silent but for the occasional swishes of hand signs being made by small, pale hands in rapid succession. There was darkness surrounding the pair at the hospital bed in the middle of the room, but they were as if in the blinding white light of a spotlight. Time seemed to stand still as the hours faded away leaving nothing but the blank determination that kept her going._

_Sakura had been working for going on seven hours nonstop. No distractions. No breaks. They were the only ones in the room and only twice had Tsunade tried to send someone in to check on her. But she had not allowed them to come in. She wouldn't stop, couldn't stop. Not until she had succeeded… or had died trying._

_She had begun by sending Sasuke into a deep genjutsu meant to calm a person and put them into a catatonic state. They were still conscious, but only on a very minimal level. It was like being in a waking sleep, if that made any sense. They could still hear and feel, but it took away all anxiety and mental stress that may be present in the patient. _

_After casting the genjutsu, Sakura had immediately begun making preparations for her own version of the curse sealing jutsu. It would take away some of her precious chakra, putting her at more risk, but she had placed a few protective seals on Sasuke to help prevent the volatile chakra inside him from spreading. By doing so, she could restrict the negative effects that removing the cursed seal from his body could result in. The only drawback to doing this was, while it protected Sasuke, it made her more vulnerable. But she had never once chosen herself over her friends. She was just not that kind of person._

_Tying her hair back with her hitai-ate, she slid down the loose off-white fabric of Sasuke's shirt from his left shoulder. She thanked the heavens that she had been smart enough to tell Sasuke to roll over onto his right side before casting the jutsu on him; otherwise she would've had trouble reaching the very seal itself._

_Placing her slightly trembling right hand on his shoulder, she began the tedious process of transferring her chakra into his curse seal using two fingers. She shifted in her chair next to his bed and closed her eyes to concentrate better. Using her chakra "messengers" as she liked to call them, she felt them move through the seal's protective barriers and into the outer core._ Here's where it gets tricky_, she thought apprehensively. Applying more chakra than before, she tried to push through without hurting Sasuke. The more chakra she applied, the more active the seal would become. If it fully activated before her chakra could reach the core of the seal and neutralize Orochimaru's tainted chakra, she would lose control of her chakra and then…_

_Forcing herself not to think that way, she brought up her free hand and made single hand signs. They were again a precaution as they served only to focus her chakra and possibly increase the potency of the protection seals. _

_After what seemed like hours of feeding her chakra into the seal, she was beginning to feel faint signs of fatigue. Her face was starting to heat up with the absence of its normal chakra flow and her vision was getting blurry. Her chakra was running low. And to make matters worse, Sasuke was starting to exhibit some strange signs. He his breathing was getting shallow and Sakura could feel his heartbeat getting fainter, weaker. Trying to remain calm, though she was anything but, she tried to lessen the amount she was using slightly. She hadn't known that it would take this much out of her, and so much out of him too. Though she supposed she had always known it wouldn't be easy, she hadn't counted on the technique taking any kind of toll on the patient as well as herself. As her breath started to become labored, she began to panic. What would she do if she ran out of chakra? What would happen to her? And Sasuke? What would happen to him?_

_Of all the times that she had thought of her future with Sasuke, she hadn't imagined death. It had never even seemed possible. That they wouldn't be together, always. They had been through so much together; her, Sasuke and all of Team seven. They had all come too far to go out so easily. Not like this. Not now. It was so strange a concept to her that all the time that Sakura had known Sasuke, he had been just as stubborn and determined as Naruto, but now, it was failing. Now of all times, when she needed it the most. _

_Steadying her frantic thoughts, she remembered all that was riding on this. And all those who believed in her. Sasuke was counting on her and Naruto too, though he didn't know it yet. Tsunade believed in her and Kakashi-. _

_Kakashi…_

_At the mere thought of him, she felt a surge of energy. Not bothering to question why, as she figured it was probably just residual happiness for their renewed friendship, she gathered up all her chakra. She would not let them down; not one. Her intense green orbs flashed with a new strength she hadn't known she was capable of. Pushing forward with all her remaining chakra in a final, desperate effort that, if it didn't work, would probably leave her without enough chakra to even keep her alive, she wasn't even aware of the strained, but determined words that left her mouth._

"_Don't you dare give up on me, Sasuke… you bastard."_

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Kakashi had left the clearing in which he had last seen Sakura and was now heading toward his favorite bar. It was late… very late, but not even the impending darkness all around him could do anything to lower his spirits. Things were back to normal between himself and Sakura and he couldn't be happier, though he showed no visible signs of it. He did have his reputation as a stoic hard-ass to live up to after all…_

_Upon reaching the bar where he and the other jounin usually came to drink at night, he entered and spotted the group at their usual table near the back. One of the table's occupants looked up just then and upon catching sight of the owner of the silver mop, motioned for him to come join them. Accepting the invite, Kakashi strolled over leisurely. _

_Their table was a half-circle booth with two extra chairs at the end. Pulling up one of the chairs, he sat down making the group six. The other five were Anko, Gai, Kurenai, Raido and the senbon-wielding Genma. There used to be one more, but they tried not to bring him up unless Kurenai did. Or until they were sloshing drunk… whichever came first._

"_Hey man, where ya been? Haven't seen you around here in awhile," Genma asked finally addressing Kakashi. "What'cha been up to?"_

_Shrugging his shoulders noncommittally as he really didn't want to divulge that particular information, he reached for a cup and poured himself some sake, or at least that's what he hoped it was, from the communal bottle. _

"_Aww, come on man! Ya gotta give me more than that!" Genma tried again, questioning his whereabouts. His whining had never worked before on Kakashi, so he really had no hopes of it working now, but hey, can't hurt to try, right?_

_Silence._

_Everyone around the table had become accustomed to this. Genma prodding his buddy for personal information, as a ninja's whereabouts were normally pretty secretive, and Kakashi's unbreakable resilience. Honestly, most of them believed Genma only did it in a futile attempt to rile Kakashi up with his pestering. But as stated before, it still had yet to work._

_With one last effort, the caramel-haired man decided to take things just one step further. "Don't tell me ya finally found yourself a woman?" Genma teased, nudging the silver-haired man with his elbow suggestively. It was a cheap shot, yes, but it was all in good fun. Like Kakashi would ever have anything to do with a female. Many at the table had already given into the assumed fact that their enigmatic friend was simply asexual. Despite this however, interest in the conversation peaked as everyone leaned in just a little closer. No one could resist the temptation of trying to learn just a little more about the ever introverted Kakashi. _

_That was exactly where he didn't want the conversation to go, although with Genma, the conversation always seemed to lead back to the topic of women. He hated listening to him share unwanted information about his latest 'conquest'. In addition to that, Kakashi also didn't want details about his latest mission to be divulged, as it would eventually lead to classified information about Sasuke then ultimately to Sakura and her whereabouts, of which he wanted to shy away from, at least in the company of others. To reveal his mission was to reveal Sasuke. To reveal Sasuke was to reveal Sakura and to bring Sakura into the conversation was definitely something he wanted to stay clear of. He didn't want the others to make any inappropriate connections between him and his former student. He had just gotten her friendship back and he didn't need to strain their relationship when things had finally gotten back to normal._

_To cut the conversation short, Kakashi gave a quick "missions, training, you know…" He lifted his cup up to his lips while simultaneously pulling down his mask and took a sip. He did it all so fast that when he looked up again, no one even knew he had just drank from the cup. Not that Kakashi had expected them to. They never did. Almost praising his own skills, he turned his attention back to Genma had raised an eyebrow, seemingly in astonishment. _

"_What?" Kakashi questioned not liking the look on the senbon-wielder's face._

_In truth, Genma, as well as the rest of the table's occupants were mildly surprised. Normally Kakashi would remain relatively quiet throughout the night and comment only when he felt it was necessary, but never before had he answered a question directed at his personal life. In fact, he had answered almost too quickly, like he was hiding something. But then again, he could just be trying to make it seem like he did. Kakashi had the power to confuse people even when he wasn't trying to._

_So as not to press the matter, Kurenai and Raido wisely decided to keep silent. The smarter of the occupants at the table, they were the only ones. Anko started making crude suggestions as to what it really was that Kakashi did in his free-time while Gai launched into a self-inspiring sermon of the springtime of youth. Genma on the other hand knew better. As pretty much Kakashi's closest friend, he knew more about the man than almost anyone else, which was pretty sad because he still didn't really know all that much. Something was different about him. It wasn't that Kakashi was hiding something, because let's face, the man was _always_ hiding _something_, it was something about his demeanor. Not quite being able to place it, he decided to drop it for the moment. There was a bottle of sake calling his name…_

_As the night wore on, each jounin got progressively more drunk. While normally going out for the sole purpose of getting drunk and rambling incoherently on the streets was highly frowned upon, in this case it was different. They were ninja. And sometimes the reality of that fact was just too much for them to handle. In those times, they sought comfort in surrounding themselves with people who knew what it was like. They sought comfort in the numbing effects of the alcohol which could take your mind off the pain of that kind of life. It was like a little piece of heaven that would fade away in the morning. It was their escape. And they needed it just to stay sane._

_Although everyone around him had been reduced to piles of piteous mush, Kakashi was still reasonably sober. Whether he was more reserved than the others or just had an extremely high tolerance for alcohol, he didn't know. With the absence of intelligible conversation, although it appeared to him that Anko and Genma were carrying on some sort of conversation using slurps, grunts and drunken hiccups, Kakashi had some time to think. He wondered what Sakura was doing and how the operation had gone. He thought that maybe she would've come to get him to tell him how it went, but figured that she must be tired. He would check up with her in the morning. He was confident that she would succeed for she had never let him down before._

_Interrupting his thoughts, slow as they may have been, a chuunin he didn't recognize walked into the bar and up to their table. Taking one look at the occupants of the table, Anko and Genma still having a 'conversation', Kurenai passed out on Raido's lap who looked like he was having some questionable thoughts about what to do about it, and Gai who was not so discreetly trying to pull a wedgie out of his leotard, the chuunin looked at Kakashi. Starting slowly as if he believed Kakashi couldn't understand him if he didn't, he told Kakashi that he was summoned to the Hokage's office immediately._

_Deciding that this was a perfect chance to skip out on the bill, Kakashi stood up to excuse himself. He spoke to Gai, as he was the only one who looked like he was still capable of understanding him, maybe, and told him to make sure that Genma and Raido didn't do anything to Kurenai while she was unconscious. Just for good measure, he added Anko's name in there too. The woman was just as crazy as the two men and twice as vulgar. He didn't trust her when she was drunk as far as he could throw her- well, since that's actually pretty far, let's just say he didn't trust her right now._

_Genma stared at his buddy's back as he exited the bar with the shorter chuunin. His incapacitated mind was still trying to piece together what it was that had been different about Kakashi tonight. Yes_, still_. Genma had a one-track mind which was not being helped at all right now for all the alcohol in his system. For one thing, Kakashi hadn't broken his finger when he had made that comment about a mystery woman, which he had last time… Kakashi had also answered a question and not with another question at that. He had seemed less irritable and in higher spirits. In short, Kakashi had seemed almost happy. _

_Shaking his head, but stopping abruptly as it was making him dizzy, he shook off the ridiculous notion. "Nah… there's no way he-," but the sentiment was cut short as the senbon-wielding man promptly passed out._

_Oh well. Easy come Easy go._

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Arriving at the infamous tower, Kakashi and the escorting chuunin parted ways. The poor guy actually looked a little relieved to be out of Kakashi's company. Maybe he found him intimidating? Kakashi didn't know why and didn't spend much more time thinking about it as Shizune came out into the hallway just then and beckoned him in. _

_Stepping through the door, Kakashi walked up to the middle of the room and awaited Tsunade's orders. The irate blonde woman behind the desk didn't even look at him for awhile. She was too busy shuffling through the massive piles of papers that had accumulated on her desk. After apparently finding the one she was looking for, she finally looked up at him. Kakashi, whose thoughts had wandered back to Sakura and how the operation was going, hadn't even noticed that the Hokage had even started speaking until she loudly cleared her throat._

"_Are you even listening Kakashi?" she sort of demanded._

_Silently berating himself for spacing out, as he knew it was highly unprofessional, he apologized and asked her to repeat herself._

_A vein throbbed in her temple, but she seemed to accept the impromptu apology. She began again. "As I was saying, you have a new assignment. A-rank. A wealthy lord named Souchiro over in Lightning Country is the client. He is one of the few lords that far east still in alliance with Konoha. Apparently he has angered some of the other lords of surrounding countries by, er… engaging in, uh… promiscuous activity with the other lords' daughters. As such, the other lords have made various attempts on his life," she paused here making Kakashi raise an eyebrow. So basically the guy needed Kakashi around to stop the other lords sending in guys to kill him. Great… In Kakashi's opinion, if the guy didn't want to be the target of assassination, maybe he shouldn't have been such a slut. But of course he didn't say that out loud. He hadn't gone insane, yet._

_A question nagged at the back of his brain. "Excuse me Hokage-sama, but why is this an A-rank mission? Sounds to me like a chuunin could easily handle this mission," he stated plainly, not wanting to have to do a mission below his skill level, as usually they were quite boring._

"_Ah, I knew you would catch on. Well, apparently Souchiro only slept with the girls to gain information. The girl's fathers are part of a secret crime organization. They control most of the funds around Lightning supposedly through trade and regulation, but the true money lies in the organization. Souchiro has been steadily losing money over the past few years and had gotten a lead on the organization. He had been wheedling information about the group out through their daughter's but was found out. What's worse is the organization has a few S-class rogue ninja working for them. Souchiro fears they will send them to kill him. That's where you come in." She smiled then, but it had such a malicious intent to it that it seemed far from happy._

_Kakashi almost groaned. Oh well in that case…_

"_Not only must you ensure Souchiro's safety, but I would also like you to gather information on this organization. They could become a threat to Konoha if they continue to grow. This will be a long-term assignment- a year at least. As such, you will not be able to simply return to Konoha if you are injured. In light of that, I would like for you to allow a medic to accompany you. Now I know that you're used to working alone, but I really think it would be best if-," _

"_Sakura."_

_Tsunade blinked as if she either didn't believe that he had cut her off or if she didn't believe he had agreed so readily. Hell, it might have even been his choice of medic that shocked her. Either way, it took a moment for her to gain her bearings back before she spoke again._

"_Sakura?"_

"_Yes. I would like for Sakura to accompany me," he stated as plainly as he could. Maybe the Hokage had been drinking again and was a little slow this morning._

_Tsunade had only paused because she hadn't known they were still in contact with each other. Sure she had been on his team and they had spent quite a lot of time together during the boys' absences, but would she really be up to it after the operation?_

"_Well it does seem the logical choice. Although I do not want her over-exerting herself so soon after-," she cut herself off here. Should she tell him about the operation? He had been one of the ANBU to bring Sasuke in, but… Deciding she would keep it quiet for a little while longer, she continued. "If Sakura is feeling up to it, then she may go. You'll have to ask her though," Tsunade said handing him the mission scroll. "I believe you can find her at the hosp- Hey! I wasn't done yet!" Tsunade yelled at the retreating ninja who had already jumped out the window._

_Tsunade gave it up, sighing, and sat back down at her desk. "Brat," she mumbled under her breath and went back to her paperwork._

_------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Meanwhile at the hospital…_

_Eyes shut tight in desperation, she poured all her chakra into the jutsu in a last ditch effort. As soon as Sakura's chakra reached the center of the curse seal a pain traveled up from the point where she was in contact with Sasuke's skin up her arm and into her head. Her sharp cry was abruptly cut off leaving her mouth hanging open in a silent scream. Her eyes snapped open and went blank as she an assault of random images flashed past her eyes. Her body went rigid as the barrage of images stopped on one. Before she had a chance to figure out what was happening, the image enlarged all around her and engulfed her. _

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Suddenly she found herself standing near the edge of a rocky cliff. There was no vegetation around, just the barren cliff, the hot sun high above beating down on her and the endless chasm below. _

"_Why?" a voice said before her. Startled, Sakura looked up at the figure facing her who was teetering even closer to the edge than she was. It was a woman. She had long black hair that despite the tattered and torn state of her clothes, still was somewhat beautiful. Her eyes were black as well and looked very familiar. She looked tired and beaten, blood staining her clothes and tears staining her face._

"_You know why," Sakura felt herself say in a voice reminiscent of Sasuke's when he was younger._

What the-?_ Sakura started to think. She tried to look down at herself, but her body wasn't listening. In fact, her body really didn't even feel like her own. Suddenly "her" body lunged forward at the woman and Sakura could hear the sharp chirping of the Chidori and the intense heat concentrated in her right hand. With a yell in the voice that was not her own she plunged her fist into the woman's body. With the sickening feel of charred flesh all around her hand, the woman fell forward, already dead. Catching her, Sakura realized she wasn't in control of her body. Taking in the sight of her arms with their white covers with blue belts she realized that not only was she not in control of her body, but it wasn't even her own body that she wasn't in control of. It was Sasuke's._

_Sasuke's hand stroked the dead woman's face, as he knelt there with her in his arms. Sakura felt her or rather Sasuke's mouth open to whisper words that would have stopped Sakura's heart if not for the fact that she was in Sasuke's body._

"_I'm sorry… Mother."_

_Sakura gasped inwardly. Sakura could feel the sadness and guilt battling within Sasuke as the corpse before her transformed into an ordinary Sound Nin. _

"_Well done Sasuke-kun."_

_She heard a hissing voice laughing off to her right but Sasuke did not look up. He didn't have to. Sakura knew only one man possessed a voice that could make her blood run cold. Orochimaru. _

_Everything around her went black. _

_--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_The images flashed before her eyes again, giving Sakura only seconds to think before the next memory. None of that happened while he was in Konoha, that much she was sure of. Which meant that it must have happened while he was away. So… _

_Finally she understood. These were Sasuke's memories! That's why she saw them through Sasuke's eyes because that was how he saw them! Her elation at figuring it out was suddenly pierced through with anger. Orochimaru! How dare he? Sakura knew that Sasuke's mother had been killed in the Uchiha massacre and so was already dead, but Henge or not, to make Sasuke not only live through his mother's death again but be forced to kill her himself?!? Sakura's fists clenched though she wasn't aware of it. So that was why Sasuke was so desensitized now. Orochimaru had forced him to kill somebody he loved, probably others close to him too._

_Sakura's rampage was interrupted once again by the next memory. Despite not wanting to pry into Sasuke's personal memories, she couldn't help but feel intrigued as well._

_--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_This time she found herself sitting at a desk illuminated in the cold room by a small candle. She could see out of the corner of her vision Sasuke's hand furiously scribbling something down on the paper. Although his arm covered most of it, she could still make out the very first line._

Sakura, I need your help.

_It was the letter that he had sent to her before all this had happened. The letter asking her to do what she was still technically in the process of doing. _

_Sakura had never had the chance to read the letter herself and so was engrossed in making out every word she could see since she couldn't actually control where she was looking. Suddenly, his hand stopped. Sighing, he turned to his left where a small window showed the dark night outside. It was such a strange feeling to Sakura; looking into her reflection only to see Sasuke's instead. _

_Sasuke continued to stare until his dark eyes glazed over. Slowly Sakura saw his reflection begin to change. Lines were appearing below his eyes and his hair was getting longer. He blinked and the eyes turned red, 3 tomoe in each. Staring back at her now was not Sasuke, but Itachi._

_She felt her heartbeat increase and Sasuke jumped up suddenly, toppling the chair over in the process. He yelled angrily and smashed his fist through the window. The loud shattering off glass seemed to accentuate the intense pain Sakura now felt in her/Sasuke's hand. Looking down at his bloodied mess of a hand, he held it close to himself and knelt on the floor muttering "I'm not like him. I'm not. I'm not…"_

_Sakura felt tears spring to her nonexistent eyes suddenly wishing this would end. She didn't want to see anymore._

_As though answering her silent prayers, everything went black._

_---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_The flood of images came once again leading Sakura to despair. The memories were getting worse. She wasn't sure if she would be able to handle this next one. Regardless, it came whether she wanted it to or not and she was helpless to stop it._

_---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_It was dark. But she was warm. It felt like she was lying in bed. She could feel the heavy blankets over her and the not quite soft pillow under her head. Sasuke opened his eyes to a dimly lit room. The view was sideways confirming Sakura's suspicion of lying down. As Sasuke's eyes adjusted to the lighting she noticed it looked like they were in an underground room as there were no windows and the walls were compressed dirt. _

_Suddenly a noise sounded just outside the room. Sasuke stiffened and reached for the kunai hidden under his pillow. The door creaked open and Sasuke's grip on the weapon relinquished. It was only Orochimaru. Though Sakura thought that was reason enough to not only keep hold of the kunai but to throw it at him as well._

"_What are you doing here?" Sasuke asked in a raspy voice suggesting he had been asleep for at least a few hours before this. Orochimaru didn't answer him, instead only smiling that treacherous smile of his and closed the door behind him. _

_Sakura felt Sasuke's heartbeat quicken as Orochimaru drew closer to Sasuke's bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed and reached out to caress Sasuke's cheek. Sasuke recoiled slightly at the cold, clammy touch, dark eyes still seeking an answer within the snake's. _

_Using the hand already on Sasuke's cheek he pulled Sasuke closer and leaned in himself to kiss him. Sasuke's eyes widened in alarm and tried to push away, but he found that his arms would not move. At some point Orochimaru had used a binding jutsu ob him. Sasuke cursed inwardly. Fear poured into his heart both from himself and from Sakura. They both realized what he was about to do._

_Orochimaru forced his tongue into Sasuke's protesting mouth and both he and Sakura screamed. Throwing off the covers from Sasuke's body, Orochimaru pulled away for a moment to appreciate the frightened look on the face of the object of his desires. Since he had been sleeping, Sasuke wasn't wearing much. The only thing he was wearing were those white shorts he wore when he was 12. Sakura gasped at the implication. _

_Using only his legs, Sasuke tried to kick Orochimaru off him, but he caught his legs and used them to pull Sasuke under himself. Pinning him down with his own weight, Orochimaru proceeded to exploring Sasuke with his tongue and hands. Sasuke was yelling and fighting for him to stop. It was useless though as it seemed Orochimaru enjoyed the boy's screams._

_Sakura tried to shut her eyes, but couldn't. She didn't want to see this. It was all like some horrible, grotesque nightmare. This couldn't be happening. It just couldn't be. Sakura repeated over and over too scared to believe this was actually happening. While some part of her downright refused to believe, another part knew it was all too real. It was bad enough that she could feel it too, but just the sight of Sasuke's terrified face was enough to break her heart. Sakura could feel the sweat between their bodies though she wasn't sure whose it was. She could even feel the hopelessness filling Sasuke's heart. They both knew no one was coming to save him._

_Ripping off Sasuke's shorts, it left him completely exposed. Finally Sasuke shut his eyes whimpering pitifully, trying to block out the sound of a robe hitting the floor. The adrenaline and fear emanating off from Sasuke was enough to seep into Sakura's system too. While a part of her was glad that he had shut his eyes so now she couldn't see what Orochimaru was doing, she knew the worst was yet to come._

_With a grunt Sasuke was flipped over and for a second all contact with Orochimaru ceased. Even with his face pressed against the pillow, he knew what was about to happen. His heart pumped so full of adrenaline it felt like it was about to burst. He was felt sure that it was about to stop beating any second now. He shut his eyes closed so tight, he could feel his head throbbing as he clenched his teeth together. It was as though time had stopped._

_Suddenly a searing pain split through this lower body and Sasuke and Sakura's screams melted together._

_Everything went white._

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Sakura's eyes snapped open._

_She was back in the hospital room hunched over Sasuke. The pain she had felt only seconds before was gone, but she felt so utterly drained. Her breathing was shallow and the room starting spinning. Amidst the swirling, she only barely manage to make out Sasuke's dark eyes opening as he stared at her blearily. She gave a feeble little gasp and collapsed on the floor. She barely even heard Sasuke when he called out her name._

_A tear slid down her cheek as her eyes began to close. The room faded and even as she tried to call out to him, the words never made it past her lips._

Sasuke…

_Then everything went black._

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Kakashi was heading towards the hospital. He had passed her apartment on the way over but hadn't sensed her chakra within. So he figured she was still at the hospital. _

_While he was running, he was also thinking. What if Sakura said no? Now that Sasuke was back what did she need him for? Shaking his head he tried to stop thinking so pessimistically. He knew Sakura wasn't like that. He smiled a bit under the mask. Part of Sakura's optimism had rubbed off on him and though he'd never admit it, the change didn't bother him that much._

_Arriving at the hospital front doors, he stood there for a moment, hesitating. Sure he might have just been going in there to talk to Sakura, but he still had to go in there and oh god how he hated hospitals. Weighing his options, he decided to forgo going up to the front desk to ask for her and just find her himself. Jumping up onto the different balconies for each room, he made his way to the one that he sensed Sakura's chakra coming from._

_Frowning a bit he noticed that her chakra signature was very weak. It wasn't rapidly fading like it would be if she was dying, just weak, so he didn't think anything of it._

That operation must have been harder than I thought…

_Landing on the balcony just outside the room he was sure she was in, he paused. He could sense, as well as hear, two other people in the room with her. Judging by their chakra flows he concluded that they were both just medics. Deciding to wait until they were gone, he just stood there. In the few minutes wait before they left Kakashi sighed. He felt like such a stalker. It was one thing to wait around in the darkness of the night to surprise attack an enemy, but this creepy lurking outside Sakura's room thing was quite another._

_After they left, he slipped into the room through the sliding glass door closing it behind him silently. He turned around expecting to find Sakura pouring over medical scrolls or something like the workaholic everyone knew she was. He was not however expecting her to be lying unconscious in the bed before him. _

_Worried, he bent over and shook her shoulder slightly. She didn't respond proving to Kakashi that she wasn't just sleeping._

_Looking her over completely, he saw that her skin was pale and clammy and her hair was damp with sweat. She looked completely spent. _

_Revising his previous assessment of how hard the operation was, he deemed it ridiculously hard if a medic with Sakura's skill could end up like this._

_Noticing that the people who had put her in this bed had forgotten to take off her hitai-ate, he reached forward and started untying the knot that had slid over to just below her left ear. When he was done, he straightened up again and was about to brush her mussed bangs out of her face when he saw two confused green eyes staring up at him._

"_Kakashi?" she whispered; the silent question of 'what are you doing here?' laced along with her intonation. _

"_I came to ask you something and to see how you were doing," he began making a point to look her over, "which apparently is not too well."_

_She laughed softly. "Ah, no. I'm fine I was just-," memories and images flashed through her mind suddenly with a loud thundering that hadn't been there before. She grabbed her head and shut her eyes shaking. Alarmed, Kakashi was at her side immediately. He grabbed her shoulders and shook her slightly as though to make her get a grip. _

"_Sakura! What's wrong? What's happening?" he asked starting to panic. At the sound of his voice though, she stopped shaking. Her head snapped up._

"_Sasuke!" she cried out panicked and then, utterly spent, nearly fell over off the bed._

_Panicking, Kakashi caught her and laid her back down on the bed gently._

"_Ok Sakura, what happened?" he asked calmly but firmly. Something big must've happened during the operation for her to have reacted like that and he intended on finding out what it was._

_Sakura was silent for a moment as though collecting her thoughts before speaking. Finally she spoke. "The operation… did it work?" she asked softly tears brimming in her jade eyes._

_Of course he didn't know, but he didn't have the heart to just uncaringly say 'I dunno.' It just didn't seem right. And despite not wanting to leave Sakura alone at the moment, he reasoned with himself that he wasn't even really supposed to be in there anyways and it looked like this meant the world to Sakura._

_Throwing away his trepidation, he spoke reassuringly, "I don't know. But I'll go find out for you. Stay right there. I'll be right back." _

_The tears in Sakura's eyes seemed to recede a little which was more than enough thanks on her part for him. Before slipping out the door, he gave her a comforting eye-crease as if to say 'It'll be alright.' And Sakura was grateful for it._

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Kakashi walked swiftly down the deserted hospital halls. Careful to avoid the one or two people who were still there, he silently made his way toward Sasuke's chakra signature. It was faint, almost too far away for him to detect, but he still managed to find the room concealing Sasuke within. _

_Peeking in through the little window in the door, he saw the same two medics that had been in Sakura's room and a worried looking woman Kakashi recognized as Tsunade's assistant, Shizune. Concentrating his chakra in his ears, he listened in on what they were saying._

"_-right here on the floor. She must have collapsed from the strain."_

"_After examining her we found that she was unconscious from lack of chakra, but her condition is stable."_

"_We carried her to one of the rooms in the Recovery Ward if you wish to speak with her."_

"_I will inform Lady Hokage of this immediately of course, but still, I can't believe she actually did it. The curse seal is completely gone…" _

_At this, he paused, thinking. So it was finally gone huh? Kakashi wondered what Sasuke would do when he found out. Would he stay in Konoha now or would he leave again now that he had gotten what he came for. For Sakura's sake, he hoped it wasn't the latter. _

_Without waiting to hear the rest, Kakashi headed back to Sakura's hospital room, as swiftly and silently as he had come._

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_After he left, Sakura just lay there for awhile, eyes wide but not really seeing anything._

_In truth, she was still a bit lost in her own thoughts. The flood of memories both hers and Sasuke's were enough to make her just want to close her eyes and go to sleep until she felt like she had the energy to sort it all out… which would be in about another hundred years._

_The horrible memories that she had witnessed kept playing through her mind. If those were just three random memories from Sasuke's time away from her then she could only imagine how bad the rest were. A tear slipped from under her closed eyelid just thinking about what he must have gone through. _

_To have had to hurt others, people he loved…_

_To have had to hurt himself, unable to escape his own mind…_

_And to have had to be hurt, in the worst ways imaginable…_

_Sakura realized now that no matter what, nothing that could possibly happen to her could ever even compare to the unbearable pain and loneliness that Sasuke must've experienced. It was something that she had thought of before, when she was still just a little girl with a huge crush, but had never really allowed herself to believe. Because to believe that was to finally acknowledge the disheartening truth concerning the two of them... they would never work out because they needed things that the other could not offer. It was a scary truth, one that made her realize how futile her attempts were and so she locked it away in the back of her mind, never to surface again._

_Sasuke had been through more than his fair share of horrible past experiences. The massacre of his entire clan, the murder of his parents right in front of his eyes and the knowledge that it was his very own brother, the person he admired and respected the most, who had done it. To cope with it, he had created a barrier around himself to stop himself from ever getting hurt like that again. At the time, all the girls in his class, all the girls hopelessly pinning away for him, had thought that this cold indifference was just too cool. And as ashamed as she was to admit it, Sakura had too. Now she knew better._

_After everything that they had been through together, Sakura's girlish perception of him had changed. Throughout the years she had seen him distance himself from anyone that tried to get close to him. This was both to protect himself and to build hatred. Hatred that his brother had said he needed if he ever hoped to kill him. Ironically in the end, it was this very thing that had led him to Orochimaru. And once he was with Orochimaru… no barrier he created nor cold indifference he displayed could stop him from getting hurt again and again and again. _

_Sakura's heart was heavy with the reality of her and Sasuke's relationship. Back then, she hadn't been able to comfort him. She hadn't understood him enough to. She hadn't known what it was that he needed. It was so glaringly obvious to her now that she was embarrassed that her younger self couldn't figure it out. What he had needed was someone there to support him. To her eternal shame, that was not what she had tried to do. But in the years spanning the gap of his absence, she had grown. She had learned what it was to lose someone you cared about. She had learned what it was like to hate someone so completely that it felt like your very blood was on fire. But most of all, she had learned what it was like to feel like you were all alone, with no one there to comfort you. She finally understood what Sasuke had gone through, and this time, she was going to be there for him. She vowed that she would. Because back then, she had tried to force him to love her. But now, all she wanted to do was help him. That was, if he was even still alive._

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_Looking up at the sound of someone at the door, she was relieved to see that it was Kakashi, returning as he said he would._

_With an unreadable expression on his face he approached her. At this Sakura's face fell and her heart seemed to plunge with it. This was not good._

_Silence enveloped them as Sakura's breathing seemed to be the only sound in the room. Finally she snapped._

"_Well?" she pressured him expectantly. "How is he?"_

_Looking up from the floor to stare her in the eyes he said gravely, "Operation successful." And then he had the audacity to smile at her._

_Mouth gaping at this unexpected development it took her a few moments to even feel relieved. But when those few moments were up, she gave a loud sigh as the weight of the world was suddenly lifted from her shoulders. She could have cried then, in happiness or whatever, she didn't know._

_Still smiling at her, Kakashi said. "Congratulations."_

_She smiled back at him. Maybe someday she would tell him that it was his unwavering confidence in her that allowed her to succeed. Looking at him again to see that he had pulled out his stupid little orange book, she scowled._

_Maybe not._

_Noticing this scowl, he decided that if she was feeling well enough to reprimand his taste in literature, then she was well enough for him to talk to her about the mission now._

"_Sakura?" he started just to get her attention._

_Breaking out of her thoughts of a certain mass book-burning, she raised an eyebrow to show that she was listening accompanied by a small "hn?"_

"_I know you just finished a critical operation and all, and I hate to ask you this so soon, but… I'm going on a mission starting tomorrow and the Hokage expressly requested that I take a medic along for damage-control I guess. And well, I chose you," Kakashi said figuring that he'd explain the details during the journey there if she accepted, though he saw no reason why she wouldn't._

_Sakura sat there for a moment absorbing the information. When she made eye-contact with him again, it looked like he was waiting for something._

"_So… will you do it?" he prompted suddenly afraid that maybe she had suffered from some sort of mental side effects as a result of the overexerting operation._

_Of course Sakura wanted to go. She really did. She couldn't remember the last time she had been on a mission outside Konoha, much less with just her and Kakashi. But something was nagging her. Something important. _

"_How long will we be gone?" she asked suddenly. She figured that they left tomorrow morning and the mission only lasted for a few days, then she'd be done and back before Sasuke even left the hospital._

_Chewing the inside of his cheek thoughtfully, he said, "About a year."_

_Sakura gasped. A year?!? Oh no, that was way too long. Not as a mission, but as time away from Sasuke. She had made a vow to be there for him and to help him not 5 minutes ago. She couldn't just break it now. Sakura's heart felt heavy with the decision._

_On the one hand, there was Kakashi. He wasn't really asking all that much of her. Just go with him on a mission. Simple really. Routine mission. Duty of a Konoha ninja. She'd done it dozens of times and would probably do it dozens more. But this time, it was different. This time, if she refused, it would cost so much more than one less mission she had been on. This time, it would cost her friendship with Kakashi. They had just now finally fixed it after almost an entire year without each other and look what it had done, Another year apart would really be it for them wouldn't it? Their relationship just wouldn't be able to take the strain, not as it was now._

_But on the other hand, there was Sasuke. She was the probably the only one who knew of what he went through. She was the only one who could help him. She needed to be there for him when he got out of the hospital. With all the people who would be treating him like a traitor, he needed a friend, support to help him through. She couldn't just abandon him, she wouldn't. Not if she truly wanted say that she cared about him. He needed her_

_She shut her eyes and took a deep breath. No matter what she decided, on of her boys would get hurt. And yes, that is what she considered them. Naruto, Sasuke and even Kakashi. All of them were her boys, and she couldn't bear it if one of them were to get hurt, especially if she was the one who had caused it._

_Sighing, she opened her eyes. Though it tore her heart to do it, she knew what she had to do. Kakashi had always been there for her, and if not, had always found a way to make it up to her. He listened to her and made her feel like her presence was wanted. Sasuke did none of those things. And yet she wasn't surprised at the words that left her mouth next._

"_I'm sorry, but I can't."_

_Kakashi's eyebrow lowered. What? He thought which was slightly dumb, so he changed what he actually said to sound a little more intelligent._

"_Why?"_

_Sakura turned away from him then. She couldn't look him in the eye. She was ashamed, but stuck by her decision. _

"_Sasuke needs me," she said in a voice scarcely more than a whisper._

_And then suddenly he knew. In those 3 small words, it said it all. Kakashi knew that Sakura had always been the type of person who put others needs and wants above her own. And he also knew that this time was no exception._

_In truth, though he had wanted her to say yes almost desperately, he knew that she had made the right choice. He could never ask her to abandon a friend who needed her, even if it was Sasuke. Kakashi almost spat the name out in his mind. Was he-? No, he couldn't be. He couldn't be… jealous. Could he?_

_That was when he knew that he had to go. It wasn't his right to dictate who Sakura spent her time with and it made him feel ashamed that he had almost tried to. Yes he definitely needed to go._

_Tilting her head up with his hand so she could look into his eye, he said with as much compassion as he could muster, "I understand," and then he was gone._

_Sakura stared blankly at the spot where he had been only seconds before. She could still feel the warmth where his hand had touched her face. She just sat there frozen in time. she had seen the look in his lone eye and it hurt. And that was when she realized, though she had fixed one of her boys, she had broken the other._

_And in the confines of her small room, she cried. For it was far too late to fix now._

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A/N- phew! Finally done. I know I promised to have it up no later than Saturday (6/30) and well though it's technically past midnight, I haven't gone to sleep yet so it's still Saturday for me, k? hey it's my lie. I can tell it however I want…

I hope the rape-ish part wasn't too poorly written cause I just sort of winged it and uh I hope this chapter wasn't too confusing. If there's anything you'd like me to clarify, just leave it in your review or pm me. I love responding to your reviews and would love to hear from you… you know, just to reassure myself that people are actually reading my story and all those hit counts aren't just me checking for reviews…

Blooper: In the scene where Kakashi's at the bar, I have Kurenai pass out from drinking to much. OMG! I'm a monster! Isn't she like at least 6 months pregnant! Uh, just pretend she just drank too much green tea and water and fell asleep because I think being pregnant makes you tired. Not that I'd really know. I just kinda figured carrying all that extra weight around…

FFnet keeps screwing with my format so I changed the weird lines I used to put in between scenes to X's although i liked them. Not that you care.

Thanks to all my reviewers, you are my anti-drug although I think maybe some readers might have taken my little joke about updating after 16 reviews a little too seriously because after I got 16 for ch.3, it all just stopped. Just because I said I tend to update after 16 doesn't mean I won't update after 16! Geez! Lol.

On another note, I was mauled by a plot bunny pretty viciously a few days ago. Ended up on crutches with my leg in cast in fact, and well I'm thinking of starting another multi-chapter kakasaku. But this one will be funny. I hope. Well tell me what you think and as always leave a review. PLEASE!


	5. Where Will You Go?

Disclaimer: …

Well it's been a long time since I wrote about their present selves or at all really, but in case you all forgot, all the way back in chapter 2, present-time Kakashi is in the clearing where he and Sakura used to go and present-time Sakura is on a park bench near the outskirts of Konoha. Just to refresh your memory a little. Well on with the story…

P.S. Congratulations to _amyXD_ for correctly guessing the artist of chapter 4. Coldplay- Fix You.

Oh, I know Sasuke's a little OOC, but I honestly don't believe he's beyond redemption. He still has some good in him; he just needs the right people and situations to bring it out of him. So just go with it alright? Ok, _now_ on with the story…

**Bleed For Me**

Chapter 5: Where will you go?

Sakura opened her eyes to find herself staring at the sunset-tinted sky. Sitting up from her position sprawled out along the bench, she realized that she had fallen asleep. And, if the warm, salty water still running down her cheeks was any indication, she had also been crying. She smiled bitterly at the realization that the memory of that night could still bring tears to her eyes. Even if consciously she would never allow it, it was clear to her that her subconscious had no such reservations.

Wiping the frustrating signs of weakness away furiously, she tried to recall just what it was that she had been thinking about before she fell asleep. Despite her best efforts, she found her thoughts drifting back to the decision she had made that night. Though she hadn't had time to analyze every possible outcome then and there, now that she had, she realized that she would've still made the same decision. Kakashi was always able to survive anything and she had no doubt in her mind that he would survive without her this time too. Sasuke on the other hand, she wasn't so sure.

In the year following her and Kakashi's separation she had spent the majority of her time with Sasuke. At first she had stayed with him in the hospital until she deemed him fit enough to leave the confines of the sterilized, white walls. When he finally could leave, he made for the old Uchiha compound, probably one of the only places where he would be left alone as no one went around there anymore- not after what had happened there.

Sakura had tended to his health, cooked his meals and fed him, for he didn't have full use of his hands back yet, despite his protests. When it became apparent that she was going to do it with or without his consent, he stopped trying. It must have been hard to swallow his pride and allow her to feed him; a sacrifice Sakura was grateful for. Accepting help when he needed it was fuel for the hope Sakura carried that someday, somehow they could be friends again. Maybe things could even get closer to the way they were before he left as Sakura had no delusions that things could ever go back to the way things were- but maybe with a lot of help from her and Naruto, they could all at least be friends again.

Sakura sighed. Back then she had needed a friend more than anything…

With Naruto constantly visiting every few hours it seemed, Sakura left the interaction with Sasuke to him for the time being and started working on cleaning the place up. She found that once all the dust was removed and a few windows washed and things shined, the place was actually very beautiful. It was a shame that it was neglected for so long; but then again, it was for good reason.

About a month after getting settled back into his old home, and with constant prodding from his two teammates, as Naruto and Sakura never stopped thinking of the three of them as a team, he started to talk. It wasn't much, random comments about the food or his condition, and even the occasional inquiry about the village and its inhabitants. But to the two of them, it was a miracle, almost more than they had hoped for. He was getting better and the two of them felt happier than they had in a long time.

A few months after that, Sasuke was up and roaming around the manor and the gardens which Sakura had also tended to in her free time. In her experience as a medic she found that a beautiful environment helped speed up the patient's recovery process. She figured something about seeing the plants and flowers healthy and in bloom did something for a person's positivity. Though there were still times when he would go to his room and not come out for the entire day, normally when Naruto was out on a mission or Sakura had work at the hospital which she had started back up only a few weeks ago, those times were becoming few and far between though.

One day when Sakura and Naruto were in the kitchen preparing dinner (ok so Sakura was preparing dinner and Naruto was just chatting her head off), the conversation turned to something that had been on both of their minds for quite some time now.

"_Ano Sakura-chan?" Naruto started off uneasily._

_Hearing Naruto uneasy about anything made her stop chopping the green onions, though she didn't turn around. _

"_Yeah what is it Naruto?" she asked as politely as ever._

"_It's about Sasuke," he started as she figured it was. _

"_I'm listening."_

"_Well I've been meaning to ask… what exactly do you think happened to Sasuke back there?"_

_Sakura froze. She was hoping he would never ask because then she would never have to tell. Sakura thought of the truth as a secret that wasn't hers to tell, even if it was to someone as close to her as Naruto._

"_I'm sorry Naruto, but I just can't tell you. It's Sasuke's secret to tell and if you're patient, I'm sure he'll tell you someday," She said as gently as she could and hoped that maybe he would understand._

_Although he seemed to be struggling with being left out, he nodded slowly. Changing the subject a bit, he asked "So why do you think Sasuke left in the first place?"_

_Sakura was about to answer when a deep voice said "Maybe I wouldn't have, if you hadn't been such a dobe."_

_Both turned to look at the dark figure that was Sasuke leaning against the doorframe. They were surprised to say the least, but both saw the tell-tale smirk on his face that they hadn't seen in years._

_They looked at each other and smiled. It was then that they knew that everything would be alright again._

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And it was.

Though Sasuke never really opened up to them about what happened, he hadn't before he left either so it was not to be expected anyway.

When he finally left the sanctity of his home to venture out onto the streets, anyone who threw even so much as a disdainful look his way had Sakura and Naruto to deal with as they were acting as bodyguards to protect him. Though he would never admit it, he was grateful. Though sometimes it seemed like it, especially before leaving the village, he hadn't always been alone. And sometimes it was nice to remember what it felt like to have others there for you. Their presence was something that he had taken for granted before so vaguely he wondered why they were trying so hard. One day after brooding on the issue for awhile, he decided just to ask. He chose to ask Sakura rather than Naruto because he did in fact want a somewhat logical answer.

"_Why are you and Naruto here?" he asked rather bluntly one day out of the blue._

_Sakura stopped what she was doing and frowned at him. "Um, we're eating lunch?" she half-asked back at him motioning around with her hand at the Ichiraku ramen stand._

_Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he tried again. "No. I mean here… with me."_

_Sakura's eyes widened and she set down her chopsticks. Wiping her mouth with the napkin nearby, she glanced to her left at Naruto who was still absorbed in his food. Looking back at Sasuke, she turned on her stool to face him completely. Sasuke was patiently waiting, for he figured that the answer to such a question must be rather complicated and she needed time to reason out a logical response. So he was surprised at the words that finally left the pink-haired girl's mouth._

"_Because you're our friend. As a genius I would've thought you'd have figured that out by now," she said smiling. Then she laughed and went back to her cooling ramen._

_Despite all its simplicity, Sasuke couldn't understand the reasoning behind those words. As he watched her and Naruto chattering away to each other, he thought back on the time he had spent with them and honestly found that he didn't warrant such actions from the two of them. With all he had done to them, he realized, he didn't deserve their friendship._

_He was quiet for the rest of the meal._

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After his sudden epiphany that day at the Ichiraku ramen stand, Sasuke started training excessively. Though Naruto who had been training with Sai lately figured he was trying to show him (Naruto) up during the next chuunin exam that they were both entering, Sakura knew that wasn't the only reason. Because although it made perfect sense that Sasuke wouldn't want to be outdone by anyone, especially someone like Naruto, she also knew that he wasn't the type of person to work that hard just to beat someone he knew he could beat anyway (no offense to Naruto or anything). So one had to wonder if there was some other reason as to why he was suddenly trying to get stronger so quickly. It didn't take a genius to figure it out so she had a pretty good idea what the real reason was.

Though she tried not to think about it and even helped Sasuke with his training as she knew that neither he nor Naruto could stand the fact that they were the only two out of the original rookie 9 that were still genin, Sakura knew she was just trying to distract herself from the truth behind the dark-haired boy's actions.

Trying to pass it off at face value she pushed the thought into the back of her mind until after he and Naruto had passed the chuunin exam. By that time she had forgotten in all honesty as she was preoccupied with trying to catch up to her two teammates again. Because somehow, someway both Sasuke and Naruto had passed the jonin exams in the year that they all turned 18 and had now set their sights on joining ANBU.

Though Sakura had passed the medical jonin exams that same year, she had no intention of going into ANBU and so was working on obtaining head medic status to at least try to keep up with them.

She remembered the first time Sasuke had told her about his intentions of joining the elite squad. She hadn't taken it well. Especially after learning of what branch he was planning on going into: Hunter-nin.

And then all her fears that she had allayed for the past two years had come screaming back up to the surface of her mind.

Sasuke was going after Itachi.

Sasuke was leaving her… again.

She didn't leave her room for days.

Though the thought of him leaving again saddened her immensely she knew it would have happened eventually. Stuck up in one's room for days gave one plenty of time to think. And what she thought of wasn't happy. But she was older now. Old enough to realize that this was just something that Sasuke had to do, just as gaining the village's respect was to Naruto or proving she wasn't useless by becoming a medic was to her. With this epiphany came a sense of calm that hadn't been there before. She had accepted it.

The first time he left it had happened so suddenly she hadn't been ready for it, but she hoped that this time would be different.

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The Sakura sitting on the bench laughed bitterly as she remembered how even though she had known it was coming, she still hadn't been any more ready for it that time than she had been for the first time.

_A low cloud passed over the light of the moon casting a shadow over the lone girl's face. She looked up. The moon was full that night too. Just as it was that night so many years ago. She ran her hand lightly over the worn, stone bench. Yes, _that_ stone bench. The same one she had woken up on the day her life had fallen apart._

_She had been waiting on that bench for hours. Just sitting in the dark stillness of the night. She sat calmly breathing in and out slowly. She knew he would come. Just as she had known last time. She could just feel it._

_A soft breeze blew her hair gently from her face and she smiled sadly._

"_I knew you would come."_

_She looked up then at the tall, dark figure of Sasuke silhouetted against the moonlight._

"_What are you doing here?" he asked hands in his pockets, leaning casually against a tree._

"_You know why I'm here," she whispered not angrily, but with a hint of sadness._

_He continued to stare at her with those onyx eyes of his but otherwise didn't move._

_Well at least he isn't trying to walk away from me this time, Sakura thought bitterly._

"_We need to talk."_

_If there was one thing Uchiha Sasuke wasn't good at, it was talking. But she was his teammate… and friend. So he would give it a try. If he couldn't talk, he could at least listen to what she had to say. He owed her that much._

_He nodded slightly and stopped leaning on the tree to show her that he was listening. It may not have been the warmest thing a person could do but it was just about all he could manage. _

_Standing up and taking a few steps toward him she sighed. "What are you doing?"_

_He lowered his gaze from her eyes and at least had the decency to look ashamed although still he didn't say anything._

_The silence persisted for another few moments in fact before he spoke. "You know why," he said quietly._

_She did of course, but she also knew that Sasuke was just trying to pass of the responsibility of saying it out loud. She wanted- no needed him to. He wasn't getting away this easily. So playing dumb she rebuked, "No, I don't. Why don't _you_ tell _me_?"_

"_Sakura don't," he said warningly without much conviction. He knew what she was trying to do, but he couldn't bring himself to tell her. He had heard from Naruto just how much it had hurt her the last time he had left and he was almost ashamed to know that he was about to hurt her again. So he stood there dumbly in silence._

_She was starting to get angry now. Why couldn't he just say it? After all that she and Naruto had done for him, didn't they at least deserve the truth straight from his mouth? The anger in her was building and formed into words. _

"_The Sasuke I know was never such a coward!" she spat hatefully. She didn't fully understand why she was getting so angry, but it was always how she had protected herself in the past. If she was angry, she couldn't get hurt. If she was angry, she could let him go._

_His eyes narrowed at this, but his face softened when he saw that she was fighting to hold back the tears threatening to spill over._

_He sighed. "I'm not the same person you used to know."_

_Somehow that calmed her. Something about the way he had said it reminded her of the old Sasuke more than ever. Always trying to prove that he was different than everyone else and yet here he was… doing what everyone else had done to her. But this time, she promised herself, it would be different. Because she was different. She was stronger now. She wiped the tears from her eyes in one motion and smirked at him. "I know. And well, neither am I."_

_Seeing that she had stopped crying he said "I'm still going to kill Itachi. You can't stop me."_

_She laughed softly and stared up at the moon. "It's always about you isn't it?" she joked. They stood in silence for a little while longer. She glanced over at his stoic face and sighed. "I know. As ninja, we never know when we could die and if we die before doing what we were alive to do, then it's like we were never alive at all. I know this is something that you have to do. So I'm not going to try to stop you. Just know that, when you return… I'll be here waiting." Then she smiled at him._

_Though his face would never allow it, Sasuke was stunned. This couldn't be the same girl that he had known. The same girl who had hopelessly followed him around. The same girl who had annoyed him every time she had opened her mouth. He knew she had said that she had changed, but… he just hadn't known how much._

_This girl standing before him was completely different. Though her hair was the same, her eyes weren't. She was smiling but behind those green orbs laid the same look Sasuke's had once had: the look of sadness and pain. Loneliness and desperation. She had seen it all with those eyes, and although he couldn't understand why… he didn't like it._

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_She watched his retreating back until she could no longer make out his figure disappearing into the dark._

_She smiled then remembering that the last thing he had said to her had been the same as last time. Although now he was saying 'thank you' for an entirely different reason._

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The Sakura sitting on the park bench stood up suddenly. With that last memory had recalled the feelings of that night. Feelings of sadness, loneliness, but also acceptance.

As if a fog in her mind had suddenly cleared, she now knew the answer to the question she had come here to find an answer to.

She had already let one of her boys go. She wasn't about to make the same mistake with the other. Not this time. Not when so much was at stake.

She took off running as fast as she could and hoped that it wasn't too late.

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A/N- Ok so I will be making the chapters a lot shorter now so that I'll be able to update faster as I'm sure you'll all appreciate. And I'm sorry that this one took so long to post. It won't happen again. No more than 2 weeks in between from now on k?

So sorry that this may seem like a SasuSaku fic, but he is probably the one of the biggest obstacles for this pairing, so I just thought I'd just clear that up. You won't be hearing from him for awhile after this chapter so it's all good right?

As always read and review and I'll get the next chapter up soon.


	6. I Don't Know You Anymore

Disclaimer: …

Ok, so I honestly don't know what the hell happened nor where the hell I went (but it may have had to do with a loss of interest and my previous excuse was college applications but that was so long ago that I'm already a junior halfway through my English major) but I have renewed inspiration and so now I can start working on this again. So sorry for the uh three year or so wait but believe me, I feel like an asshole for making you people wait and it was killing me not to be writing this as much as it was killing you not to be reading this. And sorry if it's not all that good… I kinda forgot what the hell I was even writing about… o.O

In case anyone forgot (which I'm sure they have) Kakashi is in the forest clearing waiting for the person he heard to show themselves. Yeah that was way back in ch.2… oops?

And if anyone knows what song this is, I highly recommend listening to it as it is so perfect for this chapter.

**Bleed For Me**

Chapter 6: I Don't Know You Anymore

She stopped at the edge of the clearing. Her heart was pounding like crazy but not from running all the way there. No, it was pounding from what she was about to do.

These past few years had been full of loneliness and regret. She still had Naruto and Ino, but they weren't really the kind of people whom she could talk to. It might have been because they weren't really the type to listen. In fact, the only person who she had ever been able to really talk to was the one person who she missed most in the world. Well no more. She wasn't a little girl anymore and she was going to make damn sure that she fixed this mess she had gotten herself into 5 years ago. She needed it more than she could've possibly imagined.

She took a second to fix her hair and burst in. She knew that if she stopped to think about what she would say or do, she'd lose her nerve. All she knew was that this was something she should've done a long time ago. She was finally ready to have her friend back. She only hoped that he would still want to be.

Turning only slightly so that the bleeding wound wasn't visible to the person from that side, he finally glanced upon the intruder to his solitude.

If he had been a man of any less composure his jaw would have dropped. Being that he wasn't he managed to keep his dignity, but he was nonetheless surprised.

"Sakura?"

She looked up with an emotion he wanted to call determination in her eyes from the spot a few feet away from him where she had stopped.

It seemed like an eternity had passed in the few moments that they both stood there and just stared at each other in silence.

"Kakashi," she said slowly as if testing out how his name sounded coming from her lips.

He looked on without saying a word. This was partly due to the fact that even if he had wanted to speak, he wouldn't have know what to say. It had been years since he had last spoken to Sakura face to face like this. He couldn't deny that he had thought of going to talk to her before, but the prospect always seemed so daunting, even to one such as him. She always seemed to be busy, either with work or friends; she didn't need him.

Though he could've talked to her, he was actually afraid to. He didn't want to seem desperate, but in truth he was. He missed her greatly, but he didn't want to force his presence on her; and besides, she seemed to be doing just fine without him. Possibly for his own sanity as well as hers, he told himself that his distancing with her had nothing to do with Sasuke. Sakura didn't need such a painful reminder every time she saw him and the truth of the matter was that she did think of Sasuke every time she saw Kakashi. That night had never quite left either of their minds. Not even to this day.

"I… um… I just… um…" Sakura tried pathetically. She wasn't sure what she was trying to say. She had never been too articulate so as can be imagined, the task of putting into words all that she had felt the past few years was damn near impossible. She had always been a very frank person (partially due to her inability to articulate her thoughts) and so that habit that had been engrained into her very being was what she found herself falling back on now.

"I missed you… and I'm sorry… and I want you back."

A few long moments passed in silence. Kakashi just stared on with the same blank look in his dark eye.

Sakura blushed. Oh my Kami that sounded stupid. What the hell was she thinking? After all this time a simple apology like that wouldn't be enough to erase all the years of pain and suffering she probably inflicted upon him. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why didn't she try explaining? Why didn't she try groveling, pleading even? Begging him to take her back seemed like the only appropriate thing at this point.

So that's what she did.

Seeing Sakura bend down to rest her forehead on the ground near his feet finally startled Kakashi out of his surprise-induced coma.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asked in what must have sounded a lot harsher to her than he had intended as she visibly flinched. Instantly Kakashi felt bad. She had just apologized to him and not only had he not said anything, now here he was practically yelling at her? What the hell was wrong with him?

"Uh, I meant, what are you doing on the ground like that?"

Sakura's usually fiery eyes were screwed shut in desperation. She didn't want to see the disgusted look of rejection in his dark eye.

"I know you have no reason to forgive me for how I treated you, but please. I'm… I'm begging you," Sakura nearly whispered from below him, her face almost in the dirt.

Kakashi was stunned. What was such a proud, independent, strong woman like Sakura doing prostrated on the ground in front of him? Did she really feel as though she had to apologize? Kakashi's heart dropped. Had he been that terrible?

He knelt down, and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Sakura. Get up."

"No, not until you forgive me."

Kakashi's face softened sadly. "There's nothing to forgive."

It was then that Sakura finally looked up. Her incredulous face was reflected in Kakashi's dark eye. She studied his face and couldn't find a single trace of insincerity. Her heart felt like it was pounding in her chest though as she waited, hardly breathing, for another sign that she hadn't just misheard the silver-haired ninja.

Seeing her hesitation, Kakashi stood up, gently helping Sakura up to her feet as well. "The question is, can you forgive me?" He said softly.

"For what?" Sakura breathed with breath she wasn't aware she was holding.

Kakashi looked away from her. There was silence for a moment before he spoke, "I… That night, I… I shouldn't have tried to make you choose."

Sakura exhaled in disbelief. "Choose? You never pressured me to choose. Not even for a second. And… even if you had, I wanted to go with you, you know. I just…," she shook her pink head sadly, "couldn't. I'm so sorry. I really am."

"No, don't apologize. I know you couldn't have gone. I'm sorry for even asking. I know you would never have left Sasuke like that. It was selfish for me to even ask. You're too kind a person to have ever even considered it… and I wouldn't change that for the world," Kakashi said, gently lifting her chin so she could see the sincerity in his eye. "You know that right?"

As Sakura stared into her former teacher and friend's dark eye, she felt something lift inside her. As if the cloud of loneliness and guilt and regret had suddenly disappeared. She smiled for the first time in a long time.

"Yeah, I know."

The next few days after that day in the meadow were awkward to say the least. Neither Kakashi nor Sakura quite knew where they stood with each other. They hadn't call eached other or anything. When they saw each other on the street they smiled and said hi, but after that it was clear neither one knew what to do so it often ended with one of them making some vague excuse and walking away flustered. And that wasn't even the oddest thing.

That day in the meadow Sakura had patched up the bleeding wound in his side soon after they had made up without even yelling at him for avoiding the hospital for so long. It was strange to see such a mellow side of Sakura. Kakashi wasn't used to it at all. He had fully been expecting a beating at least verbally, but she had simply assessed the wound and upon finding it to only be a flesh wound, healed it on the spot. No mention of carelessness or immaturity whatsoever.

Kakashi frowned into his morning tea. Was she just uncomfortable with him now? Was that why she was acting differently? No, he thought, Sakura had always been headstrong and wouldn't hesitate to tell someone off for neglecting their health. So then she really had mellowed out. He stirred the now cold tea slowly, his brow furrowed. Despite his best efforts to pretend that Sakura's sudden reappearance in his life hadn't affected him at all, a small sliver of thought had settled deep into his consciousness.

_I don't know her anymore…_

And those five small words pained him more than any physical wound ever could.

A/N- Sorry, it was supposed to be longer, but this just kinda was the ending point for this chapter, so…


End file.
